|
|
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 7,281
Tabarnak! 6000+ posts
|
OP
Tabarnak! 6000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 7,281 |
My boyfriend is a fucking closet case...I almost get that (really, I do...anyone who's been here long enough to hear my family horror stories will understand). so anyway...he has this fucking friend...Marie, nice girl. She comes out with him at least twice a month and ends up crashing here. She is a co-worker with him at the hospital (where he's soooo fucking concerned about apearing as just another straight guy...for whatever his reasons are) and so the first couple times I just ignored the fact that I had to play the 'roomate' (Dan needs friends...Christ this is deeper than my drunk ass can convey...).
Anyhow...I am fucking tired of playing the 'roomate' (half out of my own frustration - I don't live like this - and half out of respect for the girl...who after a long talk tonight was more worried about me than her dissapointment...stupid bitch). I took her aside and explained the situation (which she seemed to fail to grasp...again, her main concern was for my dissapointment) which she had already expected from observing us earlier...but not. Anyhow, the end of the conversation was that she would wait for Dan to tell her (reasonable, no?).
So...first fucking chance she gets, this bitch puts Dan on the spot and demands an answer. He's already ridiculously shy about himself (it took me a year to meet his parents)...and she shoves it in his face, making him angry at me (which he'll get over, but the frustration he feels...I feel so fucking bad...).
So, my question....Should I just kill the fucking bitch?
(There will be more detailed background tomorrow when I'm sober...and when I'm not sitting in front of a computer while she is sitting with Dan,,,).
If karma's a bitch, it will be my bitch!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 30,833 Likes: 7
The conscience of the rkmbs! 15000+ posts
|
|
The conscience of the rkmbs! 15000+ posts
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 30,833 Likes: 7 |
I can't be bothered to analyze the situation very thoroughly, but yes. Yes you should kill her.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 32,001 Likes: 1
We already are 15000+ posts
|
|
We already are 15000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 32,001 Likes: 1 |
let Dan handle it....but if she continues to make you uncomfortable tell dan you will handle it if he doesn't.......and if you're gay be gay and proud.....nothing worse than living a lie......also sober up before doing anything rash.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 920
500+ posts
|
|
500+ posts
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 920 |
Relax.
Every gay guy needs his hag.
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else. --Will Rogers
"I don't think anyone anticipated the breach of the levees." - George W. Bush
I don't think anybody could have predicted that these people would .. try to use an airplane as a missile, a hijacked airplane as a missile. - Condoleeza Rice
Barbara Bush: It's Good Enough for the Poor
To comfort the powerless and make the powerful uncomfortable.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 14,203
1 Millionth Customer 10000+ posts
|
|
1 Millionth Customer 10000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 14,203 |
I think its entirely up to him how he handles it. what's up to you is whether or not you'll put up the procrastination.
Bow ties are coool.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 7,281
Tabarnak! 6000+ posts
|
|
OP
Tabarnak! 6000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 7,281 |
Quote:
unrestrained id said:
Relax.
Every gay guy needs his hag.
You...are officialy a fucking idiot!
If karma's a bitch, it will be my bitch!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 32,001 Likes: 1
We already are 15000+ posts
|
|
We already are 15000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 32,001 Likes: 1 |
Quote:
klinton said:
Quote:
unrestrained id said:
Relax.
Every gay guy needs his hag.
You...are officialy a fucking idiot!
he's a left wing fanatic......me thinks he might be a crackpot.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 7,030
6000+ posts
|
|
6000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 7,030 |
Quote:
klinton said:
So, my question....Should I just kill the fucking bitch?
It wouldn't solve anything. Plus, your BF would have one more thing to be shy about.
If you went into this reltaionship with him knowing that he was not comfortable being out, that's your issue, not his. If you feel compelled to change him (possibly by outing him when you get the chance for it), that again, is your issue, not his. If he wishes to live as a closeted gay man, that's his decision and you should respect it. If you cannot, then discontinue your relationship with him.
I know a lot of his sitaution. I am only out to a few close friends and my ex-wife. I am still mulling over the extent to which I'll ever be fully out. And that's my decision. Not anybody else's. And if I date someone and develop a relationship with him, again, being out is my business, not his. And I'll be upfront about that.
If you feel he was not upfront with you about it, then you and he need to talk and see to what extent you can work this out. But don't be disillusioned: trying to feel as though it's your duty or desire to change him will only destroy the relationship.
We all wear a green carnation.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 7,030
6000+ posts
|
|
6000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 7,030 |
Quote:
unrestrained id said:
Relax.
Every gay guy needs his hag.
untrue.
We all wear a green carnation.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 7,281
Tabarnak! 6000+ posts
|
|
OP
Tabarnak! 6000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 7,281 |
Quote:
Jim Jackson said:
And that's my decision. Not anybody else's. And if I date someone and develop a relationship with him, again, being out is my business, not his.
I agree. I never forced him to compramise anything. He is the one who keeps bringing his work 'friends' around our home. In fact, tonight, my main concern is with the fact that this bitch confronted him....despite the fact that I went to great lengths to convey the situation to her (both my reasons for needing to be honest and Dan's insecurities).
If karma's a bitch, it will be my bitch!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,233 Likes: 1
Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
|
|
Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,233 Likes: 1 |
He's got to expect leading a girl on might get her angry. And yes, "spending time with a girl" is leading a girl on if she's keen. You shouldn't kill her, you should tell him to think about what he's doing next time. If he wants to appear straight in public, then do it with a girl who is in the know.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 15,812 Likes: 41
Fair Play! 15000+ posts
|
Fair Play! 15000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 15,812 Likes: 41 |
If he was bringing this woman home then I would suspect your boyfriend really wanted to be outed. It may not seem like it now but you did him a favor.
Fair play!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 7,030
6000+ posts
|
|
6000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 7,030 |
Quote:
Matter-eater Man said:
If he was bringing this woman home then I would suspect your boyfriend really wanted to be outed.
i was wondering the same thing...
Last edited by Jim Jackson; 2005-03-19 2:25 PM.
We all wear a green carnation.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 53,734
Educator to comprehension impaired (JLA, that is you) 50000+ posts
|
|
Educator to comprehension impaired (JLA, that is you) 50000+ posts
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 53,734 |
i got an idea, QUIT BEING GAY!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 15,812 Likes: 41
Fair Play! 15000+ posts
|
|
Fair Play! 15000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 15,812 Likes: 41 |
Quote:
britneyspearsatemyshorts said:
i got an idea, QUIT BEING GAY!
You first poodle 
Fair play!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 7,030
6000+ posts
|
|
6000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 7,030 |
Quote:
britneyspearsatemyshorts said:
i got an idea, QUIT BEING GAY!
That's as difficult as you stopping being stupid...Now go back to your room before you make mom mad.
We all wear a green carnation.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 53,734
Educator to comprehension impaired (JLA, that is you) 50000+ posts
|
|
Educator to comprehension impaired (JLA, that is you) 50000+ posts
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 53,734 |
ME-OW! i really pissed off the ladies today!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 7,251
6000+ posts
|
|
6000+ posts
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 7,251 |
I wouldn't put all the owness on her. There's a good chance she was interested in him romantically and a straight guy (wich is what he lead her to believe he was) taking a girl about town and bringing her home to meet his "buddy" (wich is what you were portraid as) without putting the moves on her would make her feel that there was the potential of a serious romantic relationship rather than just a physical. Just as everyone said if he wants to be out, that's his buisiness, but the same goes for you. If you're out then your out and he shouldn't force you into the closet for his friends anymore than you can force him out of it.
Putting the "fun" back in Fundamentalist Christian Dogma.
" I know God exists because WBAM told me so. " - theory9
JLA brand RACK points = 514k 
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 15,812 Likes: 41
Fair Play! 15000+ posts
|
|
Fair Play! 15000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 15,812 Likes: 41 |
Why was this moved to the Women's forum? Considering that other relationship problems posted in the Deep Thoughts forum have been stickied to the top there in the past, I question why this one was moved.
Fair play!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 53,734
Educator to comprehension impaired (JLA, that is you) 50000+ posts
|
|
Educator to comprehension impaired (JLA, that is you) 50000+ posts
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 53,734 |
its about two women, klinton and his bitch.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 7,281
Tabarnak! 6000+ posts
|
|
OP
Tabarnak! 6000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 7,281 |
Quote:
britneyspearsatemyshorts said:
its about two women, klinton and his bitch.
So fucking true, bsams...unfortuantely. This whole little scenerio is so fucking ridiculous I can't even begin to comprehend it. This week-end has played out like a bad soap opera (so much has happened since Friday...but I'm no longer drunk enough to get into it here....).
If karma's a bitch, it will be my bitch!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 24,106
faggot 15000+ posts
|
|
faggot 15000+ posts
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 24,106 |
Quote:
Matter-eater Man said:
Why was this moved to the Women's forum? Considering that other relationship problems posted in the Deep Thoughts forum have been stickied to the top there in the past, I question why this one was moved.
Gays are unwelcome in forums about important things around here.
Old men, fear me! You will shatter under my ruthless apathetic assault!
Uschi - 2
Old Men - 0
"I am convinced that this world is of no importance, and that the only people who care about dates are imbeciles and Spanish teachers." -- Jean Arp, 1921
"If Jesus came back and saw what people are doing in his name, he would never never stop throwing up." - Max von Sydow, "Hannah and Her Sisters"
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 15,812 Likes: 41
Fair Play! 15000+ posts
|
|
Fair Play! 15000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 15,812 Likes: 41 |
Quote:
Uschi said:
Quote:
Matter-eater Man said:
Why was this moved to the Women's forum? Considering that other relationship problems posted in the Deep Thoughts forum have been stickied to the top there in the past, I question why this one was moved.
Gays are unwelcome in forums about important things around here.
BSAM's posting everywhere kind of disproves that though 
Fair play!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2001
Posts: 6,236
The Swizzler.... 6000+ posts
|
|
The Swizzler.... 6000+ posts
Joined: May 2001
Posts: 6,236 |
So what happened lately klinton? Have you gotten a chance to talk to the guy yet and find out what is going on in his head? I hope everything works out!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 7,281
Tabarnak! 6000+ posts
|
|
OP
Tabarnak! 6000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 7,281 |
Thanks Princess...But right about now, I don't want to know what's in his head. He's been a pouty asshole all weekend.
If karma's a bitch, it will be my bitch!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2001
Posts: 6,236
The Swizzler.... 6000+ posts
|
|
The Swizzler.... 6000+ posts
Joined: May 2001
Posts: 6,236 |
Awwww well take care klints! I'm really sorry about all this! He'd be stupid to drop a great guy like you!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 7,281
Tabarnak! 6000+ posts
|
|
OP
Tabarnak! 6000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 7,281 |
I'm not worried about that, really. That should be more his concern at the moment.
If karma's a bitch, it will be my bitch!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 24,106
faggot 15000+ posts
|
|
faggot 15000+ posts
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 24,106 |
ooooooohhhhhhh you di'Int!!!
Old men, fear me! You will shatter under my ruthless apathetic assault!
Uschi - 2
Old Men - 0
"I am convinced that this world is of no importance, and that the only people who care about dates are imbeciles and Spanish teachers." -- Jean Arp, 1921
"If Jesus came back and saw what people are doing in his name, he would never never stop throwing up." - Max von Sydow, "Hannah and Her Sisters"
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 53,734
Educator to comprehension impaired (JLA, that is you) 50000+ posts
|
|
Educator to comprehension impaired (JLA, that is you) 50000+ posts
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 53,734 |
Quote:
Matter-eater Man said:
Quote:
Uschi said:
Quote:
Matter-eater Man said:
Why was this moved to the Women's forum? Considering that other relationship problems posted in the Deep Thoughts forum have been stickied to the top there in the past, I question why this one was moved.
Gays are unwelcome in forums about important things around here.
BSAM's posting everywhere kind of disproves that though
youre quite the sensitive girl!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 7,030
6000+ posts
|
|
6000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 7,030 |
Maybe we just need a general MEN'S FORUM.
Not for gay stuff (although it shouldn't be precluded...BSAMs, you'll have to look that word up, babe). But just for guy issues, str8 or gay.
There's gotta be some forum in which we can discuss testicular and prostate issues (hey, I'm 40, I'm having those now, goddamnit) and male pattern baldness.
We all wear a green carnation.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 53,734
Educator to comprehension impaired (JLA, that is you) 50000+ posts
|
|
Educator to comprehension impaired (JLA, that is you) 50000+ posts
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 53,734 |
is precluded like a gay warm up exercise?
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 7,281
Tabarnak! 6000+ posts
|
|
OP
Tabarnak! 6000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 7,281 |
Quote:
Jim Jackson said:
Maybe we just need a general MEN'S FORUM.
Not for gay stuff (although it shouldn't be precluded...BSAMs, you'll have to look that word up, babe). But just for guy issues, str8 or gay.
There's gotta be some forum in which we can discuss testicular and prostate issues (hey, I'm 40, I'm having those now, goddamnit) and male pattern baldness.
Jim...that seems more or less the case in here, doesn't it? If you scan the threads you notice the gammut of personal topics...not just porn.
If karma's a bitch, it will be my bitch!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 15,546
Living the dream 15000+ posts
|
|
Living the dream 15000+ posts
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 15,546 |
Can we please not talk about baldness? 
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 7,030
6000+ posts
|
|
6000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 7,030 |
Quote:
Jeremy said:
Can we please not talk about baldness?
Sorry to touch on a nerve. But for many men, it awaits...
We all wear a green carnation.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 7,030
6000+ posts
|
|
6000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 7,030 |
Quote:
klinton said:
Quote:
Jim Jackson said:
Maybe we just need a general MEN'S FORUM.
Not for gay stuff (although it shouldn't be precluded...BSAMs, you'll have to look that word up, babe). But just for guy issues, str8 or gay.
There's gotta be some forum in which we can discuss testicular and prostate issues (hey, I'm 40, I'm having those now, goddamnit) and male pattern baldness.
Jim...that seems more or less the case in here, doesn't it? If you scan the threads you notice the gammut of personal topics...not just porn.
Yeah, but we have to do it in the Women's Forum. It's like using the ladies room. There needs to be a guy forum.
We all wear a green carnation.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 53,734
Educator to comprehension impaired (JLA, that is you) 50000+ posts
|
|
Educator to comprehension impaired (JLA, that is you) 50000+ posts
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 53,734 |
strange that you feel its wrong to use the womens forum for men talk yet have no qualms about fucking another man even though they are for women to fuck. isnt it ironic?
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 15,812 Likes: 41
Fair Play! 15000+ posts
|
|
Fair Play! 15000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 15,812 Likes: 41 |
Quote:
Jeremy said:
Can we please not talk about baldness?
Lots of women like the bald guys.
Fair play!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 7,030
6000+ posts
|
|
6000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 7,030 |
Quote:
Matter-eater Man said:
Quote:
Jeremy said:
Can we please not talk about baldness?
Lots of women like the bald guys.
Lots of guys, too.
We all wear a green carnation.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 15,546
Living the dream 15000+ posts
|
|
Living the dream 15000+ posts
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 15,546 |
It's not a sore subject...I just don't want to lose my hair. I like my hair, but it's thinning.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 418
400+ posts
|
|
400+ posts
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 418 |
Quote:
Matter-eater Man said:
Why was this moved to the Women's forum? Considering that other relationship problems posted in the Deep Thoughts forum have been stickied to the top there in the past, I question why this one was moved.
When were relationship problems stickied to the top of the DT forum?
|
|
|
|
|
