RKMBs Forums MAY 2009

within the same time frame, just a few days later we finalized the photographer, there was even more good, accomplishizing news; alexis decided she found her place. the reception hall. this was key, really. the photographer we had major ground on now. the church we had picked, but still not formalized. all of the other crap, like limo and dj and fruitiness was still left in the air, but i didn't really care about any of that. the reception hall was the most important part.

i figure, everyone is there for like 5 hours outta the day. all the other things are just sorta minor. i mean, no offense to that jesus guy n'all, but we're at the chapel for an hour tops -- more likely 35 minutes. the limo ride is a thousand-dollar, 15 minute joke. the flowers no one notices, the quality of my shoes is insignificant, etc. but the reception hall. the seating. the open bars. the food! this is what counts.

we saw 3 places on that first day. we made plans to see 2 more, both of which we preemptively didn't like based on their website galleries, word-of-mouth, and/or location. alexis and her mother took a few trips to see some more spots when they had a chance. and then... magically... alexis found one. on january 23rd, they visited a place called the richfield regency. alexis walked in and immediately fell in love with it.

truthfully, that's the reaction that is most important to me for wedding stuff. my hierarchy is as follow's #1 alexis's opinion #2 cost and #3 lack of my rejection. for the reception hall, there is a variable right after #1 and just before #2 -- #1a food/booze.

having already nailed #1, the biggest hurdle was outta the way. and unlike the first place she loved, there was no issue with #2. unlike the places we hated, there was no issue with #3. so we were feeling really great about this place. very confident things could be taken care of. we spent the last week of january and the first week of february pooling our options. making sure we were on the right path. doing research where possible.

by the end of the first week in february, alexis revisited the place. they again treated her like royalty. she was again in love with everything. but this time, they made the offer better than ever before while simultaneously addressing point #1a -- they threw in tons of free food tables (which are normally hundreds of dollars extra) and made the ultimate promise: any cocktail hour food remaining after cocktail hour was ours to keep and take home.

decision made. and i didn't even have to go!

that day, the check was written. the place was booked. we now had something official.

with the reception hall selection, and secur...ation, outta the away, we felt much better about everything. a significantly better feeling than the day we lost the place she thought she liked, and even betterer than the day we toured through a buncha options in crapland. this was something we both loved and it was now couldn't-be-taken-away official.

we were in the going-back-and-forth process with the photographer we met, just asking final questions, making sure all was kosher. my mother made sure our favorite priest, fr. martin, was ready and available for the service. and we had at least the date secured for the chapel. now, we just wanted to make it official with the church.

to do so, seton hall made it a gigantic pain in the ass. which, i suppose, we should have remembered, as they were fond of making everything a gigantic pain in the ass. moving in, registering for classes, getting the diploma, applying for RA or DA status, etc. her name is seton hall... her name is seton hall.

we attempted to secure the chapel for our date like 8 months earlier. you'd think you could just call, find out if the date was free, ask for it, sign up for it, pay for it, whatever, then you're done. but, no, seton hall said they didn't take reservations on the chapel more than 18 months in advance. 19 months? not good enough. we tried. finally, in january, we were able to at least pencil it in over the phone. that was enough to get us the right to the day, but still not enough to make it official.

after the richfield regency check was sent in, we made it "official time" to secure the chapel. there were all sortsa forms and documents that needed to be filled out. we had to prove that we attended the school by producing our diplomas. there were questionnaires that had to be answered to prove we were ... i dunno. americans? catholics? actually getting married? im not exactly sure what they were for.

the only thing that was crystal clear about the event was that the church was ready to receive their "donation". ...which in no way, shape, or form is a donation. it's not optional. its not a charity write off. it is a mandatory check that must be sent, within a specific time frame. so we meet again, SHU process... but as in my year's past there, this too was a process i'd get through with flying colors to happily secure the church for the day. thats two big things down.

pushing all this "wedding" stuff outta the way for a second, we were approaching valentine's day. both of which are seemingly opposite to any form of love or affection, but rather giant financial toilets o'scammery. and yet, here we were, happily marching towards another one, as the calendar relentlessly dictates.

Valentines day. the scourge of every mans life. the scourgier scourge of every mans wallet. it is a plague to all of society. rumors have long since reigned that the holiday was invented by greeting card companies, but i disagree. i think it was created by shipping (and handling) companies. $20 for roses, and $20 for the shipping of roses? you go to hell, online rose selling company.

fortunately for me, alexis is quite amazing when it comes to valentine's day. in fact, for the most part, she actually turns it into a day for me instead of the traditional vice versa. for the past few years, she's matched any contribution i've put in, going way outta her way to get me a gift, or take me some place nice, or make me some sorta kick ass monster meal.

this is awesome on a regular year, but now that we were heading into this disastrous saving-money mode, it was especially awesome. aweshome, even. for the week leading up to valentine's day, she was planning out this amazing feast she was gonna prepare for me, made of multiple meal layers like them there fancy people eat.

each time she prepares these types of banquets, and there has been a few of them, she goes all out into a theme of some sort. either a type of a food or some sorta similar ingredient, like mustard or asian or latin, or whatever. this time, she dove into one of the classics, and likely my favorite of fooderies: italian. and holy fuck, did she go all out with the awesomeness.

buschetta, garlic bread, stuffed mushrooms, tuscan chicken, minestrone, home made salad dressing, this kick ass broccoli rabe orrechetti combo... even this awesome drink called "the godfather", made especially for me. took her hours to prepare everything, using every square inch of the kitchen. then we got all dressed up, set up the nice table, lit a few candles... made all that marriage prep stuff pretty damn easy, ill tell you that much.

here's one. just a few days after this fantabulous evening with my girl, i find myself sitting in police HQ on february 19th. at 3am. it's not the typical place i'd expect myself to be, particularly at this time of day. i think i've only been there once before, when cati's car was ...not stolen. but no, this time, it was all me -- the defining moment in the "rob vs nigeria" holy war.

so let's rewind a little bit, to a lost-like flashback. i own two apartments. for a few years, i've been renting out my old one. in general, it's been a mental nightmare. not nearly as bad as it could have been, but often too much for my brain to handle. admittedly not much, but c'mon, this is a story here.

for a long time, i was renting to a company. they were out of LA, and they had occasional meetings in NYC, so they'd essentially use my
place like a hotel. Fine by me, cuz it meant the place was always clean and relatively empty. but then last year, I got this big idea that I'd sell my old place. Money was tight, and the headache was growing. I began shopping it around to realtors, and when my tenant's annual lease was up, we agreed to shift to monthly terms. this freed me up to sell it on shorter notice, and they were cool with that. for a bit. then money got tighter for them, too, and they had to back out of their NYC needs. oy.

their last month was the first month the apartment was up for sale. the second month, it was empty. then the third. i slowly began to realize "holy crap, this chick isn't gonna sell my place". i was forced to find another renter. my plan for less headache had, thus far, only turned into more.

this lead to me putting up listings on local websites and craigs list. that's how i got my last renter, so i knew it was successful. and, within a week, i had another renter. but, she, too, used the month-to-month lease to her advantage, instead of letting me use it to mine, so she was out in early february of 2009. at that time, i dropped my old strategy, and my successless realtor.

you remember her.

at that time, i got a new realtor focused on selling the place. he was reliable and smart, never threw up idocy all over my place -- a significant step up. we made a plan and got things in motion. at the same time, the economy had begun turning to shit a few months earlier, so all of the original figures were now way, way off.

fearing the worst, i simultaneously decided to find a renter as well, just as a backup. maybe fill in a few months until the thing was sold. so, back to the internet i went, and again within a week or two, i had a number of interested individuals. most eventually faded away, but one remained, and enthusiastically. this guy wanted the place and was ready to commit.

he was so ready to commit that he sent the check. sight unseen. and the check was for more money than i was even asking. and then... everything sounded waaaaay too good. i was already really suspicious with the guy's emails, since he sounded like he was foreign foreign. not just regular foreign, but foreign even to foreign people. like a modern day balki. all sortsa typos, odd phrases... quite similar to all them nigerian folks who wanna leave me hundreds of millions of dollars in a european bank.

but, whatever, he's willing to send money, right? even if its a scam, which it feels like it has to be, i'm still in the driver's seat. i play along, email back and forth, etc. he says he can send the money, but (paraphrasing) he has to send the allotment as is, which is too much, and then wants me to western union the money back.

so now, all the red flags go up. im thinking, definite scam. something will happen and his money will be delayed, but he'll want me to send him my money. all the old lady grammas send their checks then appear on the news two weeks later broke. i wont be like them! i have my own teeth!

...but then i get the check in the mail from him. and it is, essentially, double what the rent cost is. that... catches me off guard. but, alright, it wont clear, right? i go to the bank, deposit the check, and a few days later, it's cleared and in my account. all that beautiful money. i physically go to the bank and speak with the manager and bring up the exact deposit to make sure all is kosher, and he confirms it. could this... i mean... is this ... i mean... could it really be something good happening to me?

now, he wants me to western union him/his attorney the remainder of the money after i take out the month's rent. he gives me an address and says we're all set. i wait a few more days just to make sure the bank is clear, and nothing changes. it looks great, but... just sounds wuh-HAY too fishy to be true. so i dig around a bit... and looks like it is to good to be true.

apparently, there is a new scam type that does this exact thing. it's even suspected to be mostly the same people as the nigerian email / bank account scammers, which would explain all those great sentences in our correspondence like "pleaseth to meets you, i am the happy" and so on. well, not that bad, but close.

the stories go on to say that i send a check for the remainder of the money back, then a few weeks later, my bank finds out the original check was a phony or something. i lose that money, and the money i sent to them is already gone. worse still, there were reports that people this happened to were then held accountable for holding stolen money, since sometimes the bad checks originated from stolen accounts. those people were fined, or jailed, on top of everything else.

that sounded like something i didn't want to do. at this point, i assume the money is bogus, and i'm smart enough not to send my own money to them, but i dont wanna get into added trouble for being scam-associated. so, i turn myself in to the fuzz. i call up the police dept one night, and am told i have to speak to a detective during the night shift.

i'm up then anyway, so i pick what i think is a quieter hour, like 3 am, walk over to the police dept a few blocks away, and plop down in the waiting room before i can go in to talk to the cop. start typin up this lil blog memo at the time to keep my memory nice n'fresh. twenty minutes later, i'm explaining the whole deal to two detectives, all dragnet-like.

basically, they tell me it's happened before. they assure me its a scam. say that the check could take weeks to show up as fake in the bank's system, and at that time they'll deduct the funds. but they tell me im in the driver's seat as long as i have the money and haven't sent anything back. they say to wait it out. they'll investigate the originating money account, and make sure i'm in the clear. that sounds much more like a place for me.

in the meantime, i just decide i'm gonna fuck with this guy. i had already been stringing him along, not sending him the money for various reasons, like the banks and postal offices were evacuated, or i had the bird flu. whatever. to amuse myself, i do my best to speak exactly like him.

admittedly, i get lost in my nigerian character on occasion and go overboard with the conversation -- using hundreds of exclamation points, multiple verb tenses in the same line, always signing my emails with something like "besters in the westers" or "environmentally yours", or my personal favorite "the lord has smiled his non-death ray upon me", etc.

at one point, i even started something up after the rental date was missed, where i was willing to compensate him for my delay and send him a check back if he would send me a larger one first. essentially, i was nigerianing (verb form!) the nigerians. i would demand to speak to his assistant or lawyer or whatever, and he had to continually create fake email accounts representing each in order to respond to me with the information i asked.

unfortunately, i was unsuccessful in getting him to send more documents or money via the mail, but i imagine i could pick up the conversation in a year or so, and he'd still be as willing to do business as ever.

eventually, i got a phone call from the detective with some updates. they checked out the original account and found that it was used multiple times for specifically this purpose. thankfully, it was a "crime account" instead of some unsuspecting old lady or something. they have since gone in to seize / freeze (please?) the account to make sure it can no longer be accessed.

best of all, i was 100% guilt and trouble free.

worst of all, i was 100% new-renter and new rent check free.

and that makes for an unfortunate unbalance. death ray style.

if there's one thing i've found that helps make the terrible go away, on a relatively consistent basis, its great quantities of celebratory alcohol. granted, it tends to subsequently bring about it's own form of terrible to join in on, and thus destroy, the new party... but it also tends to be worth the risk and effort to get there.

mardi gras this year was on february 24th, just a few days after my police adventure. alexis decided she'd take a vacation day on the next day so that she could take advantage of her youth and spirit to party the night away with me in hoboken at our local nawlins bar, oddfellows. fat tuesday was meant to be lived up, and damnit lived up it would be!

lex got all decked out in a hot mardi gras appropriate shirt, and already supplied beads from mardi gras past. i got decked out in ... the same clothes i spent the earlier 16 hours working in. we have different viewpoints on what the earlier part of the day would mean. but we were both focuses on the late evening portion. we even managed to convince laquanda to also take the wednesday off so that she could party on with us tuesday evening.

by about 9:45, i had finished up what i needed to finish for the day. we took some pregaming swigs o'happy booze in my apartment then strutted over to oddfellows a few blocks down the road. the place was already jam packed with people. most bars were decently crowded, as its a pretty celebrated drinking event in hoboken, despite being a tuesday. but only oddfellows had the actual mardi gras feel because of its new orleans themed decor. ... and cuz they had a huge stage with hot chicks up on it doing what mardi gras chicks are sposda.

thus, there was a decent sized line wrapping around the door. typically, i'm quite anti-line. especially since it was pretty cold out that night. but because this really was the only place to be (did i mention the stage?) i mentally prepared myself to be ready. this was where we were stayin.

thankfully, the lines moved quicker than i hoped. we were probably only outside for 20 minutes or so before we were able to force our way into the main party room. and, once there, it was instant awesome. loud music, tons of booze, beads everywhere, girls everywhere. full spirit of the day was understood to the fullest here.

of course, that meant fullest prices for the regular drinks were also charged. an unfortunate little happenstance on such occasions. the hurricanes at oddfellows are awesome, but $10 a pop is a bit much. particularly when they're being served in plastic dixie cups instead of the traditional, much larger hurricane-special glasses. but, whatever, they're filled with all types of booze, so it was worth the ride ...regardless of how many times it was riden.

for most of the night, we were right up front at the stage, drinkin and dancin and laughing and having a ball. we were runnin for beads, stacking up our tallies, watching all the girls do their thing... it was really a lot of fun. alexis really really liked it, too, so i was just happy that she was happy.

plus, they were giving away tons of free and useless crap. but free useless crap, at least at the time of giveaway, is more valuable than anything you could ever possibly imagine. never before would you think of killing yourself, and all those around you, to grab an $11 t-shirt out of the air -- especially a bright yellow one with a bar logo. but during game time, you go all out. no matter what was flying through the air. tshirts, beads, panties, hats, free booze, whatever.

we were makin all types of friends too, as everyone was in the same awesome mood. and, with 100% certainty, we were the stars of the evening, completely dominating in bead total count, total smiles, drink totals, bonus girl moment totals, etc. this was a good night. one of the absolutely pure-fun nights that are so friggin rare.

we stayed until just before last-call, and did the walk home at around 1:30. triumphant in our success. wobbly in our steps. but happy in the moment.

with february coming to an end, and march starting up, you can finally start to see a dent in the daylight quotient. mornings are just a bit brighter, evenings are just a bit shorter, etc. i keep tally of how much sun is left at 5pm each day and love seeing it go the distance. so, surely, now we're that much closer to warm weather.

but no. no, says earth. earth wants to pass me a message and it is that earth makes the decisions here. and it has decided to spite me with cold. nearly subzero temperatures. and, more damning, snow. and not just that girly snow where there's some flurries and then prancing and then it all melts and goes away. no no, earth was done fucking around. this time, it was throwing the big guns.

on the night of march 1st into early march 2nd, hoboken was the recipient of 6 inches of snow -- the heaviest downpour we'd had in the area in a few years. just 45 minutes away, my parents were dealing with feet instead of mere inches. just when y'think things are gettin a teensy bit better, the whole deal goes to hell. frozen hell.

alexis ended up getting a few more days off of school, which was a nice bonus for her. me, there just is no such thing as snow days anymore. if it snows all day or if its 90 degrees outside, the work stays the same. its one of those "pure goodness" things i miss about being a kid.

oddly enough, i still like the feeling, though. if it starts snowing around midnight (never earlier, cuz it could melt by morning!) there's a part of me that is excited to see how much snow damage is done the next morning. likely the same part of me that still gets upset and sad as we approach every september. i haven't gone too school in 10 years or feared it in 15+, but that part wont go away.

i have to imagine its that same part that also has a great collection of batman statues, too. that guy is alright.

the main thing i was worried about with all the snow and the freakishly cold weather was the fast approaching hoboken st. patrick's day. every year, the first saturday of the month of march is dominated by the color green. not the actual st. patrick's day, which is never even close to the hoboken day. and not even the irish, cuz there's surely only a few of them.

no, it's everyone. every person throws something green on and congregates in groups. relishing in the luxury that is cheap alcohol. and all starting at the noble time of 8. AM.

earlier than most work days. just an hour or two after the sun rises. long before most places are even open. it is in this time range that hoboken st. patrick's day begins. every single year. whether its the already-awake and already-dressed folks grouped together at apartments for keg drinking or individuals piling up outside of bars in lines that wrap around the corner. people are so excited for the day that nothing has to make sense. drinking matters that much!

now, me, i'm all for drinkin. i'm all for hanging out. i even like thanksmas-like spectacles being created for my own general amusement. but early? that's... that's not something i adhere to. i mean, i'll do earlier-than-normal. like, instead of waking up at 4pm on a saturday, maybe i can squeeze by 2pm?

meh.

unfortunately, that option just doesn't easily exist. the demands for st. patrick's day are too large! even if i wanted to sleep in super late, there are parties going on in every neighboring apartment, and every neighboring apartment building, that it would be impossible. many of the bars even feature "starting whistle" type sirens that sound as soon as they open -- which, on this glorious day, is between 8 and 9 am. a bar! before school used to start! oh if only the two would mix...

for the past few years, i just decided to have people over my apartment for the day. then, if we decided we wanna go out somewhere, we can. my initial reaction to that most of the time, however, is to never, ever, ever, ever leave. its so goddamn crowded outside, to a ridiculously insane degree. even the less popular bars have 2 hour lines to get in for almost the entire day.

and when your reward is a $9 bottle of bud lite, it just sorta paints a frown on it.

so, instead, i invite everyone over. i've got a cool apartment, i've got a nice deck, and i have tons and tons and tons of booze. add all that with my hatred of going out on the day, and you got yourself a nice lil situation!

to prep, the night before, alexis and i spend a nice and easy friday night out. grabbed a bite to eat, maybe a drink or two, but really just took it easy. mostly it was about setting the table for the next day, literally and figuratively. i did the typical huge fresh direct order, complete with all the chips and snackeries. we ordered a 6 foot sub from blimpie. alexis made tons of green cuppiecakes. got the whole spread up and ready.

the next day, we were up relatively early for us. maybe 10ish. lotsa noise was already filtering in through the walls and windows, so it was easy to tell what day it was. i told everyone to show up in the ballpark of 1pm, knowing that opens up a larger window of people arriving between 11am and 5pm, but it was well worth the gamble, and gave us enough time to get settled.

the parade starts at one, but we just didn't feel like attending this year. all i ever really care about is the giant guinness man, and he hasn't even made an appearance in the last few parades. so knowing i'd have to wait outside in the vomit-stained streets just to be rejected by the walking beer person wasn't an attractive offer.

for the time being, i was far more than content to simply hang out at my apartment. and because of freakishly odd circumstances, via wizards and sorcerers, i was able to do so outside on my deck. yes, despite the fact that some 5 days earlier there was the heaviest snowfall of the year, hoboken st patrick's was sunny and in the 60s.

and, sure, ok, 60 degrees isn't exactly tropical. but when its mere hours from the freezing temperatures we just had, it all of a sudden feels so much warmer than it really is, and it does so gloriously. so, first, it was just me on my deck. overlooking the city and two neighboring roof parties. then, alexis sat by my side, with multiple beer cans and two giant beer glasses, in which we were to mix the long-lost gummibeary potion for green beer: beer and green food coloring.

we toasted. we sat back. we soaked in the sun. we people watched. it was friggin awesome. soon after, mary, laura, and matthew showed up and did the same; welcome to my beer stockpile. then danielle and paul. then laquanda and kathy. then randy and his brand new dog maggie. it was awesome, though sad that so many others didn't get the day off. kathleen and michael were out. andy was busy. brandon couldn't, jack bailed, jamilet and cati were working, etc. scottie was busy, too. ...with his new girlfriend. but that new chapter will have to wait for... a ... new chapter.

for the rest of the day, we pretty much just gluttonily beasted on the fun of the day. JR was having a party down the hall, complete with bagpipe players that i believe he rented for the day! cops ran around our hallway at some point looking for noise troubles n'such. but we were mostly behaved. mostly. beer shotgunning, laughing at everything, and screaming with the neighboring parties aside.

randy's dog was still a puppy, so that took a lot of focus from the girls. where as i could not take my mind off of the delicious sub sammitch that i knew i was going to be happily feasting upon for the next few days. no one stayed too, too long. and before it got too late, alexis and i did walk around the town for a bit, just to see all the levels of damage.

by 9 pm, the town was trashed. power was temporarily out everywhere, including my building. there was so, so, so much vomit at every corner. people laying all over the place. it looked like a bomb went off. but a happy bomb, made of miller lite. and thus, hoboken st patrick's day showed its dominance once more, and all was well in the land.

as the week returned, so did the onslaught of the work week. the weather cooperated on hoboken st. patty's day, but turned against us soon after. whoever decided to make new york the capital of the universe sure didn't enjoy sunny beaches, cuz this shit was freezing.

on some days, the cold doesn't really affect me. i'm allowed to just sit inside at my computer all day long, rotting my eyes and brain from the inside out. but on other days, my tasks involve traveling through out the city, going office to office, meeting and greeting.

all told, i must say, i've become really good at it. i went from never being a sales person, to sales person of mild success, to one of pretty darn good success, and now, to some what of a product czar that can speak on behalf of the product and hypnotize others into using it. im still not near a "bob" level sorcerer, but the "rob-level" is coming along nicely.

one meeting that i waas actually really looking forward to, business possibilities aside, was the meeting i had on march 13th with yes network. this was awesome for two huge reasons: 1) because its the network of yankees baseball and 2) because their offices are located in the chrysler building, my favorite building, and one i'd never been to before.

i even got there like an hour early, just so i could go full retard and snap a buncha pictures from down the block and across the street and all that type. like a good ole fashioned japanese tourist stereotype. then, once inside, i got the full of the lobby, then the full tour of two different yes network floors!

all kindsa memorabilia and posters and pieces of the (now) old stadium, models of the (now?) new stadium. and, to make the situation even better, the meeting itself also went well! and... yes... im just as excited for that as i was the other two things. ...yes... yes of course.

there were a number of pretty big deadlines to hit mid march, as far as work was concerned. several projects that had lasted months were all coming together, ready to be completed, and looking for, of course, some sorta immediate, simultaneous launch.

what better time could my computer possibly find to stop working?

well, it didn't entirely stop working. just continued not working enough that it made my working more than difficult. i had some sorta virus that mated with another virus and had little virus babies. they were running all around my programs, and spilling over on to the keyboard and mouse. it was disgusting. worst of all, they were unpredictable.

sometimes it'd just cause things to crash. other times, it was a flood of popups. all of the time, it was so incredibly frustrating and annoying. both because i really needed it to be working and because i wasn't able to solve the problem on my own. few things piss me off more than something i can't take care of myself.

i downloaded tons of different spy/malware removal somethin somethins. many of which needed to be run for like 4-5 hours at a clip, and i couldn't also use the computer while they were running, so it was puttin me outta commission. but rather than take a nap or something, i just broke out the ole lappy.

she's lil'er, and crankier, and can't seem to do nearly as much, but she was good enough for the time being. i pillaged her of all her available ability as the all-star was in the DL. took about 5 days, all told, to even get close to operational. and even after that 5 day stint, it was another week going from 90% working to 100%.

you've won the battle, malware, but not the war.

hoboken st. patrick's day is ridiculous. nonstop drinking for 16 or so hours, the town quadruples in population, girls are flashin, guys are pukin... it's just this insane party. ...on a day that, really, doesn't even mean anything, other than being the first saturday of a month.

the real saint patrick's day, march 17th, is significantly more subdued. this year, it fell on a tuesday, which helped subdue the event to an even subduier level. it's actually somewhat sad. the real day gets no joy or celebration at all. the fake day gets 85% of the party, then the saturday just before the real day gets like 12% of the joy. poor lil real st patty only gets 3% smiles.

there's still drinking binges and such here and there. but its nowhere near the scale of the others. i ended up not going out at all, barely even recognizing the day. i had no in person meetings, but tons of calls and tons of deadlines. so i just did an 18 hour stint blinding myself in front of the newly fixed computer.

the real st patty musta been so jealous that he passed word to the town about the fake one, cuz now the town is thinking about enforcing different policies at next year's fake st pattys. apparently, there was so much rampant crime and sidewalk peeing and street vomit and tree sleeping and such that they got annoyed.

which... i dunno, just sounds like more money for the town. every drop'o'pee on the street was like a $1,000 fine. that's not such a bad deal. plus, they bump up parking to like $65/day, and anyone who doesn't find it legally has a $700 boot on their car.

i think the city is better off with the crime.

...plus, all those flashing girls! don't you take that from us, hoboken!

oh my high school friends, really the only one i see with any level of regularity is randy. there's the occasional brandon, morgan, jack, even pachtman. but beyond them, i don't really see anyone else. not in person, anyway. facebook and shtuff doesn't count, since there's a brazillion people on there that befriended me, and i barely remember who they are, if at all. i'm terrible like that.

andy i see maybe three or four times a year. i've known him since kindergarten, maybe even a few months prior, so that's going back about a quarter century, disgustingly enough. but, even through out college and such, we've always managed to stay in contact.

every so often, we'll call one another up and decide to hang out. grab some beers, or some whiskys, and just chill at some bar. this time, it was thursday, march 19th. he works in long island, but lives in brooklyn. i live in hoboken, but work in manhattan. so, typically, we're always just missing one another. but we always pick a nice equidistant location, typically around union square, where we can meet up.

its always good times. random bull shit about growing up in randolph, all the catching up on whatever we're doing now, but neither in the pretentious "oh, that guy on the street went to my school" kinda stupid way. its all like actually stuff we want to hear about.

we talked a bit about my upcoming marriage "thing", and his not-that-long ago fizzled out engaged "thing". i never really ask him anything direct about that, just cuz i don't think i'd want people asking me about it. but then i feel bad when everyone else calls me a fuck nugget for not being polite ...meanwhile, i thought i was!

at this point, though, i think he understands where i'm coming from, regardless of whether it's a stance he agrees with or not. at least i hope. whatever the situation, i know it can easily be fixed up with a few pints and a few slices. probably about due again for some soon.

as the end of march and beginning of april took hold of the calendar, one definitive moment was soon to arrive: the start of the new baseball season. as soon as "that one" rainstorm hits, and the next day is kinda nice out, so the smell of wet grass and dirt is in the air... nature just feels like baseball season.

so, sure, i haven't been any part of an organized baseball team in a decade plus, but it still makes me feel all energized and ready. and this year takes on a whole new special meaning, as the start of the baseball season means the opening of the new yankee stadium.

the old stadium was hallowed ground. still breaks my heart to know they're not gonna play there anymore. by late march, the new stadium was already up and complete, and don't gemme wrong, it's gorgeous. absolutely breath taking. but there's the lingering sensation of it being "not the same". regardless, i was all anxious to get there. and, of course, anxious to go with my dad.

i was a little put off by the notion after reading all the articles about how expensive all the seats were going to be. the old stadium was bad enough -- behind home plate was $250, the dugout $225, lower deck averaged $85, upper deck $45, bleachers $18, etc. and all of that was face value. and all of the tickets were sold out. so you were gonna be paying at least double those already high prices to get your butt in there.

regardless, i know i gotta get to the new stadium, and i'm desperate to take my dad, so i give the ticket site a whirl. they just announced single-game tickets were available, and i wanted to see if maybe i could grab some upper deck seats or something. much to my shock, i found two available seats for opening day. saw "$60 per ticket". smiled in relief. clicked through the process. ...then saw that the "$60" was the convenience charge. for having the luxury to buy the tickets online. the tickets... were $2300. a piece. i X'd outta that transaction with haste. fast haste.

ridiculous. behind home plate FACE VALUE is $2500. not a typo. rows behind those rows were $350. dugout $325. lower deck averages $100+. upper deck is friggin $70+! absolute insanity. throw in the whole "worst economy since the great depression", and it's no wonder they are only getting like 35,000 people to the game now. ...and that seems like a pretty generous figure!

with one W formally out of office, it was time to introduce a new W. hopefully one with better public speaking ability. by the end of march, hoboken's brandy new W hotel was finally ready to open for bidniz. they'd been constructing the bad boy for what seemed like years (and i guess it was maybe 2), but it was finally all up n'done.

i knew it was gonna be a glamor hotel, having visited (notably not "stayed at") a W hotel before, both in LA and NYC, but what i didn't know was that they had plans for all these clubs and restaurants and lounges and even super high class apartments for rent within the same complex.

the apartments were gorgeous. huge, new (obviously), with windows directly overlooking the hudson and unobstructed widescreen manhattan skyline. presumably in high def. all the other types of fixins, like ... i dunno... elevators and doorman and ... wires? stuff expensive places were sposda have. particularly, expense: they were valued at 7 figures a pop. i guess those people were going to the new yankee stadium.

there's sposda be some good steaks at the main restaurant, and the main lounge is actually sposda attract some celebutard types. more importantly, them hot bitches. i like them. not the $22 drinks i have to buy just to sit by them and continually be occularly (!) rejected by them, but the looking-at-them part is nice.

the place certainly stands out in hoboken, formerly known for its quaintness. and while it is large and bold and splashy, i spose there's still a charming appeal to the structure; certainly fitting in with the super upper class that have dominated hoboken for the better half of the past decade.

we made some plans to check it out in a few weeks, to see what was doin. maybe stare at a reality show star or somethin.

the end of march and beginning of april finally, finally had a "we're not really in winter anymore" feel to them. i wouldn't go so far as to call them spring-like days, despite the calendar factuality that it now was spring. but, suffice it to say, the days were getting a bit longer. a bit warmer. and i was digging it.

oddly enough, it tends to be the smells i notice first. winter has no odor. it's just cold and dry and meh. spring offers lots. and not just the standard flowers blooming or guy's in shorts that are too short with cologne that clogs up the street. there are other smells that do a better job of cuing me in on the timing.

there's the afore-mentioned "Wet dirt" baseball-related smell. there's the smell of spring festival type food, or even just food in general as people start cooking with the windows open. as the sun starts to shine, you get that "heated up pavement" type smell, notedly different between sidewalk and street surfaces. everything smells fresh.

and, yeah, not a single other person notices this type of stuff except for me, cuz i'm some level of handicapped that involves taking notice of things not another person cares about. but i do. and they're unmistakably springish. and, fine, yes, after the smells, the other great things about spring finally become more recognizable.

the sun rises just a bit earlier, the shadows stay around just a bit longer. the trees go from stick piles to stick piles with bumps, then lil tiny buds. there are more birds in the air. the sun finally has some "oomph" to it. start to finally notice some bugs flying around town, etc. and, of course, most importantly, is the fact that girls start to wear less and less -- and what they do wear is tighter and tighter. but this post was more about some of the nature bull shit. ...er, beauty.

for the first weekend in april, alexis and i decided we'd do dinner and a movie. er, movie, then dinner. for whatever reason(s), we more or less gave up on movies the past few years. at best, we're seeing like 4 a year. the last movie we saw before this weekend's planned event was "the dark knight" the previous summer, about 10 months earlier. not a great record.

the plan was actually to drive up to the randolph area. first, say high to my folks n'all, but then hit up a movie in the brand new rockaway theaters -- coincidentally also where i saw the dark knight, the second time, with my father. also 10 months ago. the theater is amazing: clean, large, clean. new! and clean.

the movie of choice, unfortunately, was not up to "the dark knight's" level. this time around, it was "i love you man", a comedy outta the slack pack brigade, in which alexis and i were both clearly suckered in by the commercials. there was little-to-no comedy to be had in the film. outside of enjoying the comfy (and clean!) seats and still being impressed by the theater, the funniest part of the film was talking over it; commenting on its shittery.

afterward, we went from dover to motown (then later back to my parents for a complete randolph experience!) where we met up with mary and matt at my favorite motown ....motownery, the office. its a catch all type barstaurant in the area; fun when i was in high school, completely rebuilt, and fun again now.

the four of us had no huge agenda for the evening, and no one could drink all that much since we were all responsible for driving, but it was awesome just to hang out and BS with our various "lost" theories, or whatever happened to be taking place on the day. nonsense begets nonsense!

from there, back to randolph. some parent time by the fireplace before they called it an evening. and we had our last opportunity to toast by the fire before spring took over for real.

i don't really use my jeep all that much during the year anymore. i don't drive to work, i get my groceries delivered, all the shops and such are within walking distance of my apartment, etc. really, the only times i hope in the jeep is when i'm driving to my parents house or driving to lex's house.

so, the fact that my windshield had a noticeable crack on it one day early in april was all the more frustrating. it musta been just one of those lil tiny things, like a pebble hit it on the way to randolph one day, and it grew and grew. whatever the story, it was now a full blown slice through the glass -- bad enough that it needed attention. one more thing for the pile.

knowing that my life is pretty much poo right now, my family actually helped me out big time. kathleen met me in hoboken on april 6th after her job in the city, then drove my car home to randolph. my dad had the whole thing taken care of and fixed, and then he and my mom drove up to hoboken the next day to drop it off and grab some dinner. looked beautiful, shiny and new, plus some company for the evening.

i never know where to take my parents for food. it can't be a bar, or some place super crowded or loud. has to be nice enough for my mom, but casual enough for my dad. its a whole selection process. we ended up going to buskers, which has become the parents go-to place, since its one of the few places that fits all the requirements.

mom had no early curfew, since one of my aunts was watching the old folks, so it was great. she got a sangria and was drunk outta her mind on the first sip. not drinking for the first 50 some odd years of her life apparently robbed her of any form of tolerance, but its so funny cuz she has sucha great time. she's singing and laughing and smiling, which is great for her cuz she needs and deserves it.

we hung out for a few hours before they decided to call it a night. we peeled my mom off the table from her not-even two sangrias. the whole time was really fun, though. hanging out with my parents like they were still my parents, but also like they were my pals. my drinking pals! good times.

the following morning, and every day afterward for 8 consecutive business days, i had more early morning meetings. some went very well, some were so-so, some were just followups. but all of them were simultaneously terrible in the very notion that they were "early morning meetings"

not at all a joyous thing for me, as i'm very, very dumb in the mornings. worse so when the mornings take place only 2 or 3 hours after my evenings end. worse still when i have to wakeup even earlier to adjust for my dumb factor. even if a meeting is just 5 minutes away, i have to wake up an hour earlier to give my body a chance to de-sleep and un-dumb. sad but true process.

but, as the spring continues to ...spring, it is so very great seeing the early morning sunrise over, and in, the city. light bouncin off of every shiny tower and sparkly homeless man. really fun to see.

generally, all of the business stuff continues to go well, too. we're at this whole new chapter of the "goings ons" that is different from all the previous stuff, but still not real-enough yet to detail. lots of "fingers crossed" type feeling to it.

while that doesn't definitively mean "hooray for everything!" type dancing, it does at least mean that something is going on. a lot of the boredom with business, and with life as a whole, is the monotony of thinking nothing is changing or evolving or moving in any form of direction. so, just seeing how things are, even if its seeing them at 8am in the glowing light of sunrise, leads to some better feelings.

the following weekend was an eastery one. that left friday, the goodest of all fridays, as the only drinking opportunity, which i think makes me a terrible person in some book. that bible thing. but, c'mon man, moses didn't go to no 16 day web conference seminar. and jesus's blood-alcohol level was clearly through the roof.

we actually didn't do anything too crazy, abiding by the "no meat" rule, for whatever reason. i seem fine with breaking all types of "thou shalt nots", but for whatever reason, the "...eat beef" rule gets to me. it was purely spaghetti or pizza, in terms of options.

on easter eve, i.e; saturday evening, alexis usually takes her gramma to ukrainian mass. its like regular mass, but way longer and in a funnier language. but that meant i had the option of driving her all the way there, then back to my apartment, or just over to randolph for the evening. not heeding my previous holiday self-advice, i decided to go to randolph and spend the night.

and, really, this one was no where near as tense as the other holidays, im assuming because its a much lighter day than a christmas or a thanksgiving. nowhere near the tension or frustration levels of the others. in fact, it was pretty relaxing. it was still cool enough saturday night for me to crash by the fireplace. got to hang out with my dad for a bit, shootin the breeze.

next day was some brief set up. the "regulars" plus gino plus lex's mom and gramma. a straight forward meal. all calm n'regular, like we were people! i did, of course, have to stop off at bromilow's on the way there saturday evening to load'em all up on chocolate. i missed the chance to order it online, so it was worth the special trip.

all told, it was a good visit. i think everyone generally had a good time, and it was only a few days after my mother's sangria night, so we got to tell all the stories ...and start over with a few more drinks!

the whole following week was spring break! that meant tons of time off, lotsa stayin up til the early hours of the morning, then sleeping all day. staring at girls walkin around in their tight swim wear. eatin lotsa party time food, and having a blast. ...for alexis.

for me, it meant nothing. nothing what so ever. spring break monday was the same as every other monday before for the past 1,000 years. except with electricity and stuff. and my laser mouse. otherwise, identical.

while that absolutely meant i was gonna havta continue working my incredible number of ridiculous hours, i also didn't want alexis to feel her well-deserved break was ruined. its my craplife, it doesn't have to be hers. so i did my best to ensure that at least some of these days featured some fun stuff for her. anytime i could squeeze a few extra minutes out of something, schedule meetings earlier, whatever. anywhere i could save time, i dedicated it to her.

i'd take her out to dinner, or maybe for some drinks, took some time to sit in the park, etc. general, boyfriendural duties. we watched a buncha tv together n'all that fun stuff. oddly enough, we did not go see any movies, even though it probably would have finally been a good opportunity to.

but we did make some larger plans that invariably mostly fell through: going to see carisa, going to the museum of natural history, revisiting the top of the rock grill, etc. all good ideas that we still wanna get to, just need s'more time and opportunity to go get to'em.

one thing that we did get to was the auto show at jacob javits. its something i always wanted to go to, but oddly enough something alexis really wanted to go to. normally, it'd sound like one of the things i'd have to drag her to, but she was all in for it -- more excited than i was.

we found this cool deal online that included tickets to the show with tickets on the ferry across. like $25 a person, which is a pretty good deal. got our stuff together, rode the boat, and arrived at the show expecting to see all these cool flying cars, cars that fold up into brief cases, cars that only have one door and its on the bottom of the car -- you know, all that weird faux future shit dreamed up by the jetsons or back to the future II.

instead, we were greeted with... mostly... cars from this year. maybe the occasional, spectaaaAAAaaacular 2010 sneak peeks. but we'd walk around and look at all these trucks and sedans and whatever in a manner not that different from just walking around a mall parking lot. almost everything there was an existing street model.

and, ok, maybe that's exactly what is sposda be there, i dunno. i've never been to a car show. my mind was all filled with the glitzy glams! i envisioned all these slutty bikini models laying on top of hovering sports cars. instead, i saw all these older, balding men in bad business suits standing in front of minivans. with wheels. boo!

it wasn't that bad. especially after getting over the initial shock. we did get to see some of thew new transformer-starring cars, like bumblebee's camaro. there was a new model corvette, and a zr1, and just a handful of the futuristic type-o cars we were hoping to see. if anything, it was fun to just walk around and see everything in a unique "you gotta do this once" event.

afterward, we boated home. even gotta chance to right the light rail (having inadvertently boarded the weehawken bound ferry). the light rail was surprisingly clean, and small, but gave us a few ideas for drinking on upcoming nights!

one of the things we got to do during the break was drink! well, ok, that's not too surprising or exciting, but we got to try out a buncha different places; buskers, mile square, hobson's o'nieal's, green rock, four L, black bear, trinity, 3forty... we were on a tear! but there was one place we specifically wanted to test out: the W.

for year's, i'd been watching them build the relative-monster from my deck. now, it was finally complete, and ready for people to stomp in and get poo-faced within. and who deserves poo face more? who!? alexis and i picked a night where we could visit cati while she was workin at 3forty, then drift over to the hotel right next door, give the whole thing a looksie.

from the outside, it looks all glammy, and we weren't sure if there were intense dress codes or something else annoying. but after spotting a few folks inside with jeans, we felt our fanciness was fancy-enough, so we strolled in. we were a bit hungry, so we asked for a table at the restaurant, knowing there was a wait where we'd get to enjoy the open lounge area in the meantime. they dub it "the living room", which i guess is a apt if your living room is filled with collar-up douche faces and model-like chicks strutting everywhere.

lex goes for martini, i go for whiskey, and we both go for couches. very crowded, very hip, very neon blue light. it's not entirely our scene, a bit too classy and pretentious, but not overbearingly so. in fact, its definitely at a level we could comfortably fake, which lowbrowed it beneath some of the other bars in town. the steady stream of commercial-level attractive chicks was a nice touch.

the wait, unfortunately, was a bit long. we were probably waiting for a table for around an hour, and seemingly unnecessarily so. then waiting for our food for another hour, again unnecessarily so. but they were really cool about it. didn't charge us for drinks, salads, or desserts. a significant plus.

the place is definitely above a "hang out" location. it doesn't require a dressed up position, but does sorta ask for one. its not just a place we would stumble into after green rock. but i definitely liked it enough to revisit. next time, we'll just strut in all james bond style. and ill only sing the theme on the inside of my brain.

since moving into my new apartment, now creeping up on 5 years ago, i've always had a problem with the blinds. real earth shattering revelations there, i know. the blinds in the living room were shit, falling apart, and trasparent; moreso in certain sections. not a huge problem, but pretty gross.

for a long time, i wanted to replace them. mainly for aesthetics, but also for green reasons! cuz i'm very green. ...which, really, means more the color of money, since my old blinds just told all of the summer air conditioning to spew outside, and let all the cold winter air in.

plus, and perhaps most important of all, all my windows face east, which triumphantly announces morning time at around 5:30 am, daily. by shooting sun-fueled laser beams through my closed eyelids, directly into my pupils. that was something i really wanted to get a handle on.

for years i looked, even scheduled some free quotes, but it was always like this ridiculous $2k sum. and since the blinds are not made out of a year's supply of turkey sammidges, i'd always decline. but then a place by me had this massive discount, and i jumped on it.

they even sent over one of them "gays" to check the place out, make sure it all fit with the decor. personally, i've always found it difficult to match up anything with batman statues, piles of cardboard boxes, and year old empty bottles of booze. but this guy knew to immediately nix all of my first choices, for all of my reasons plus a few others, like resale value.

so, i ended up getting something much better, for much cheaper. it does everything i want, and more. they are knock out blinds (aka "vampire blinds" to alexis) that make the apartment pretty dark even at the height of day. they're also neato in that i can open them from the top down or bottom up, revealing only the sunlight or skyline.

by april 18th, the weather had really cleared up. things actually felt like spring now, instead of everyone just telling me it was supposed to feel like spring. finally, the sky gods were playing along with the script, and no longer holding out for their ridiculous demands. points on the backend? yeah, great try, theoi ouranioi.

it wasn't exactly summer yet, but the sun was warm. the air was crisp. the breeze, if there was one, wasn't arctic, but gentle. the buds were nearly full grown on the trees, and there were a lot of leaves all over the place. baseball season was fully underway, and the yankees had formally opened their new stadium just a few days prior.

it felt good. business was at a solid point, weather was doing well... things were just clicking. and, for whatever reason, the weather just has a way of controlling the entire view point on things. even if something wasn't going that well, all it would take is a quick walk around town, in the 70 degree weather, with the girls in ... warm weather appropriate clothing, and all of a sudden, the world is golden again.

notions like that truly make me wanna revisit the whole "why the fuck do i live in the north east" question. i mean, honestly, how are places like NYC and london amongst the world's most powerful and/or populous cities? they're miserable! foggy, cloudy, damp, clammy, rainy, gray... i mean, my god. warm places should rule! hawaii should be a super power. they should have the UN there, and the hall of justice.

san diego is still out there for me to look at. i even have a website book marked that tells me how warm it is over there, every single day. oh, whats that? another day of 75 degree sunshine, with zero percent chance of rain? well played, san diego. well played. in the meantime, i'll just do my best to enjoy this several-week range of really nice weather over here. and i'll like it.

for the whole next week, i was literally emptying out my apartment. at least in terms of comic books. i have been selling comics on ebay for years, but since... oh... october? i had maybe moved 50 or 60 different auctions, just fully dropping everything i've ever owned. after roughly 15 or 20 years or so, i believe i have officially ended my comic book connections.

it's a three-pronged effort: getting money, getting space, ending childhood. two outta three aint bad. i have not read a single issue of a single book in... i'd say a year, maybe more. i've still collected a few through last fall, but eventually noticed them stockpiling in this vast heap o'garbage i knew i'd never intend to read.

this isn't necessarily a statement on decreasing quality in the dramatic "i can't take this anymore!!1!" rant, from internetted individuals who very damn well know that they can take it more. its just the collective, and perhaps a little sad, realization that i no longer want to spend the time on the medium. i saw months worth of new books piled up and didn't for a second think about how great it was that i could read them, like i would have years ago. now, it was just the despair of thinking i had to read, then sort, then collect and/or sell them or whatever. i wanted, and got, out!

so, over the past 6 months, i've sorted, listed, and ebayed 90% of my collection. massive groups of books just being thrown together, boxed, and auctioned. as quickly as possible... which isn't all that quick, cuz those sunnuva bitches are difficult to organize. but whatever, i'm movin'em; like a rehabbing crackhead ebaying off his remaining and favorite crack. except much, much more legal.

for the last two weeks in april, i had at least 4 new auctions for sale, every day. i'd work my 15 or 16 hour shift, then spend 3 or 4 hours sorting books into boxes and making lists of what i was sorting. the next morning, at some point after a few phone calls, i'd march down to one of the two closer post offices with three 15lb boxes of nerdery, ready to ship them off across the world for 20% of their actual costs.

box by box, i was removing an entire chapter from my life. and, really, with the added space and some spare cash that i got in return, it's been way more of a good thing than bad.

the last week of april was filled with technical difficulties. just like the ones you see on tv, where the news reporter falls off a ladder or something, starts to inhale for this unholy, blood-curdling scream, then the TV picture goes blank, only to later be replaced by some sorta cartoony test pattern, and a funny play-on-words visual, like the phrase "we'll beeee right back" with the picture of some friendly honey bee.

well, not just like that, but that's how my brain reflects back upon it. the two issues that simultaneously popped up were actually quite fixable in nature, they were just horrifying because of their product's respective level of importance to me: my tv and my cell phone.

by HDTV standards, my HDTV is middle-aged. it's about 5 years old now, no longer the technical powerhouse it once was. still very crisp and clear and awesome, and in no way, shape, or form am i even contemplating replacing it just now, but it's certainly past it's youth and vigor of yesteryear. one key indicator is ...the... key indicator light that occasionally flashes when the "lamp" is running low on juice.

cutting edge 2003 tech occasionally required bulbs in televisions, apparently. at least in mine. and, by "bulb", i mean several hundred degree, several hundred dollar, "lamp." after years of usage, it apparently wears down and needs a replacin'. the lamp is sposda cost like $4-500, and because it's vital to the TV (e.g; without the new lamp, i have a very large tv-looking statue) i've entered into a whole world o'poo.

fortunately, the age of the tv is also my reward. sure, it's something that needs a lamp cuz its so old, but because the lamps are no longer in demand, the $500 price tag is way out the window. i was able to do a quick search online and find a few places selling them for $200, $150, even one for $89 with free shipping. that guy was the winner!

nothing seals an online transaction faster than those magical glowing words "free shipping".

part two of the technical nightmare was my cell phone. nothing too spectacular about the notion that i was upset with a cell phone; i've had maybe 6 or so since the mid 90s, and they've all been shit. horrible, horrible pieces of shit. they're broken or clunky or slow or faulty or a brazillion other issues that make me loathe the very invention.

but that pretty much changed a few months earlier, in october / november of '08, when i got an iphone. sure, i was selling out to corporate thugs, becoming a mere cog in the apple powerhouse clearly set on brainwashing agendas. but im ok with that! the iphone really has been this kick ass lil device; for email, for games, for apps ... even that phone thing part!

and it wasn't just the "first week glow" that blinded me about how happy i was with the purchase, i actually still love it some 6 months later. i've never had a cell phone more than 10 days without growing to despise it, like the unnatural hatred super villains hold over their hero counterparts. i plot, often, about destroying the phones and delighting as they shatter. that just isn't so with my iphone.

months went by without a single issue. no slow down, no glitches, no moments where i'd just stop getting reception, etc. flawless. ...until the last part of april, when the home button, the only button, stopped functioning properly. it wasn't broken, just slow. i thought i could tough it out, but eventually it became an annoyance. my fears that this was yet another cell phone to betray me started to surface.

but then i scheduled a trip to the apple store on april 28th, and took a trip to 14th street after a nearby meeting on 21st. i explained the problem, they took 5 minutes to troubleshoot, saw the same problem and... gave me an entirely new phone! no hassles of arguing for service or scouring through pages of legal text for loopholes on how to screw me. no asking for managers, and then manager's managers. no calling up people with thick indian accents who apparently go by the name "steve".

i walked in. i said problem. they give phone. that was it. the worry and fear of having the issue resolved was immediately taken care of, and the iphone instantly became my favorite best friend again. notta bad way to round out an april.