The Rimmer Experience Theme:

If you're in trouble, he will save the day

He's brave and he's fearless, come what may

Without him, the mission would go astray

He's Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer

Without him, life would be much grimmer

He's handsome, trim, and no one's slimmer

He will never need a Zimmer

He's Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer

More reliable than a garden Strimmer

He's never been mistaken for Yul Brynner.

He's not bald and his head doesn't glimmer

Master of the wit and the repartee

His command of space directives is uncanny

How come he's such a genius? Don't ask me

Ask Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer

He's also a fantastic swimmer

And if you play your cards right,

then he just might come round for dinner

He's Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer

He's Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer

Snarf is shit. His death will be rejoiced!