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Singles Match
single choice
jafabian (40%, 14 Votes)
Penwing (60%, 21 Votes)
Total Votes: 35
Voting on this poll ends: 2024-05-11 5:46 AM
Women's Match
single choice
Kimi (42%, 15 Votes)
Cowgirl Jack (58%, 21 Votes)
Total Votes: 36
Voting on this poll ends: 2024-05-11 5:46 AM
Best Buy Gift Card on a Pole Match
single choice
Joe Mama (60%, 21 Votes)
Notwedge (40%, 14 Votes)
Total Votes: 35
Voting on this poll ends: 2024-05-11 5:46 AM
Tag Match
single choice
Urg & First National Bastard (67%, 24 Votes)
The Triple Set (Grimm & Doc. Mid-Nite) (33%, 12 Votes)
Total Votes: 36
Voting on this poll ends: 2024-05-11 5:46 AM
Singles Match
single choice
Chewy Walrus (54%, 19 Votes)
King Snarf (46%, 16 Votes)
Total Votes: 35
Voting on this poll ends: 2024-05-11 5:46 AM
Tag Match
single choice
Drzsmith & BSAMS (53%, 19 Votes)
The Aussie Scumbags (Danny & Dave) (47%, 17 Votes)
Total Votes: 36
Voting on this poll ends: 2024-05-11 5:46 AM
#1 Lightweight Contender Match
single choice
Captain Sammitch (24%, 8 Votes)
KrazyXXXDJ (9%, 3 Votes)
winged creature (0%, 0 Votes)
Soy un perdedor (24%, 8 Votes)
The Captain of Outer Space (6%, 2 Votes)
backwards7 (26%, 9 Votes)
rexstardust (12%, 4 Votes)
Total Votes: 34
Voting on this poll ends: 2024-05-11 5:46 AM

whomod said: I generally don't like it when people decide to play by the rules against people who don't play by the rules.
It tends to put you immediately at a disadvantage and IMO is a sign of true weakness.
This is true both in politics and on the internet."

Our Friendly Neighborhood Ray-man said: "no, the doctor's right. besides, he has seniority."
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And here it is, the Havoc before Robblemania. The competitors are gearing up for the biggest event in online wrestling, Robblemania. Tonight's main event: a BATTLE ROYAL to determine the top contender for PJP's Lightweight Faggot Championship belt at this Sunday's Robblemania. We will also see the Triple Set and The Aussie Scumbags warm up for their clash at this Sunday's Robblemania in seperate tag matches against long-time RDCW competitors Urg & First National Bastard and former Heavyweight Cheese Champion Drzsmith & BSAMS. Cowgirl Jack readies herself for her Robblemania match against Women's Boobie Champ Stareena for the gold. Joe Mama faces off against NotWedge in the craziest gimmick match that I've ever seen: a Best Buy Gift Card on a Pole Match. This match really has nothing to do with Robblemania. Plus, Kristogar Velo will sign his contract for his first ever title defense at Robblemania on Sunday. Just who does Nowhereman have in mind for that match? That and more tonight on RDCW Tuesday Night Havoc.









Robblemania!

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Inglourious Basterd!!!
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Ben Harper's Faded starts up. The crowd starts cheering but stops as, two seconds in, there's a sound like a needle scratching against vinyl. There's a long pause, long enough for the crowd to get a little uncomfortable. The JOE MAMA steps out and new music plays:

Ghoultown - Fistful of Demons

The audience loses its shit as the music pumps through the speakers and Joe Mama makes his way to the ring. Black jeans, steel-toes boots, sunglasses (that hide the black eye he's sportin'), and a T-shirt that reads "The Future Of Hardcore Is Now", Joe gets to the ring, mic in hand.

I know what you're thinking: King Snarf this. Dodge that. Blah blah blah. Not tonight. I'll make mention, but there's a more important matter at hand, though it pains me to say his name. Or maybe that's just my ribs...

NotWedge. Let's get this outta the way. You called the match? You got the match. Plain and simple. I don't run and hide when challenged. I'll fight you and, since you're so generous, I'll take that Gift Card off'a your hands.

But keep this in mind: Last week you took a beating that didn't belong to you. Me? I walked into that ring knowing that I'd only get one of you before all Hell broke loose. I accept that with no bitterness or complaints. But you...the battery (no pun intended) that you endured, the elimination from that match, the pain and injuries you sustained DIDN'T NEED TO BE!!! You took a spot meant for another, and that's why I went for you. A message needed to be sent to the cowards of the Triple Set and the Power Trip and, just as they used you (that's right, NotWedge, you were used like a condom on Prom Night) to cover their own asses, I used you to get my point across. I'm not easily eliminated, and I'm not going away. So, NotWedge, ponder those facts as you get ready for your match with me. Keep them in mind as you sit in the same locker room as the guys who have no problem throwing you to the wolves to save their own skins. And remember them as you enter this ring, NotWedge, because the beatings don't get any easier for you from here-on-out.

And King Snarf? I hope you've been paying attention, pal. 'Cause what I've been dolin' out and what your buddies have been giving back is only a fraction of what I've got in store for you, chump.

Ghoultown starts up again...


Uschi said:
I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry.

MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost!

"I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock

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I command you all to vote for rexstardust.

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Here it is guys & gals,the final Havoc before Robblemania & we still dont know the full card yet.
Well I've got two announcements to make:
Firstly I got news for thedoctor,I have just booked you in a match at Robblemania.
Your match will be against myself & Joe Mama,but I'm not an unfair man so I will be giving you a tag partner & his name is Rob Kamphausen,the CEO of the RDCW!

Secondly you all wanna know who young Velo will be taking in in his title match.
I have thought long & hard about this one & there are a lot of guys who I believe have earned a shot at the big one.
After much deliberation I finally settled on Velos oponent will be........Drzsmith........bsams.........Llance.........JQ & ROY BATTY!
Yes,it will be a six way elimination match,now thats what I call a headliner!

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Not that I care because I'm still the champ........but shoudln't I defend my Lightweight Faggot Championship?

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I mean True champions fight every night.

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Doesn't matter I'll wait till Robblemania.......I don't care who wins...........I'm gonna kick their ass all over the place.

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As PJP is about to leave the ring, the lights dim, and a raspy voice is heard over the speaker system.


Darth: You want a match tonight? Careful what you wish for...


The lights go out. There is a flash in the ring. When the lights come back on Darth is standing behind PJP.


Darth: ...It just might come true.


Darth grabs PJP's head under his arm and delivers the Sithspawn (reverse DDT). As they hit the ground, the lights go out. When they return, PJP is lying in the ring, out cold. Darth is gone.

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Darth



You want it you got it




You want it you got it. Motherfuckin Freak

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*The lighting changes in no way and no music plays as Notwedge heads for the ring.*

Nw: I almost feel sorry for Joey Muumuu. After last week, when I tore him apart in the asylum rules match, he has to come right back for another beating at my hands. My bloodlust, my berzerker rage was so powerful last week, I can't even remember what atrocities I committed. I've been assured, by my friends in the triple Set, that I was the MVP of that match. That was just the beginning, however. There are no limits of any kind in the Best Buy Gift Card On A Pole Match tonight. But, believe me, if there is a way for me to go too far, I will. I don't know if you're a religious man, Joey Muumuu. I'm not sure if you believe in a supreme being. But I assure you, tonight you will commune with the Supreme Beating. Which is to say, I'm going to beat you up badly. I just wanted to be clear about that. Uhm, that's all. I probably should have stopped at the "Supreme Beating" line...

*NW drops his mic and leaves.*

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Green Day's "Espionage" hits as King Snarf makes his way to the ring...

Ladies and gentlemen, how the hell are ya? This is shaping up to be a red letter year, both for myself and my comrades, the Triple Set. But before I discuss the road to Robblemania, I would like to address the comments made towards me by Joe Mama. For weeks now, Joe has had this unhealthy fixation towards me, and I have vowed to uncover the roots of his mental disturbance. In fact, on the next Havoc, I will televise the first installment of my investigative interview series entitled "What's up with Joe Mama?" I hope to bring to light Joe's obsession and, God willing, get him started on the healing process.

Now, on to the matter at hand. As I'm sure you are all aware, 2/3 of the Triple Set will face the Aussie Scumbags for the Tag Titles at Robblemania. Now, the question everyone has been posing me is which of us illustrious superstars will in fact be in the match. Well, to be brutally frank, it's none of your goddamn business! Does the Coach give the opposing team a copy of his playbook before the big game? Hell no. And so it is with the Triple Set. But make no mistake, it honestly doesn't matter who's in the match, because the odds are in are favor. The Scumbags have been defeated by the Triple Set before, in a hellacious tables match, and history will no doubt repeat itself. Simply put, Danny and Dave pissed off the wrong bunch of bastards, and this Sunday, they will know the meaning of pain. King Snarf has spoken!


Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!

All hail King Snarf!

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Ya see, Urg and I don't need to talk no shit. We let our actions do the talking.

Or, as Urg would say... We am kick their asses!


First National Bastard -Enormous, Sexually Voracious Lecher... who wants to claim your immortal soul!!!. Every time you masturbate, God Kills a kitten! Please... think of the Kittens. RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE!!!!!
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PenWing is heading to the locker room after his match when he collapses. He comes to a few minutes later. A paramedic is standing over him, asking him how many fingers he is holding up. It is determined that he has suffered a concussion from his match. He is then sent to the hospital for further examination. It is unclear when he will be able to return as an active participant of RDCW.


<sub>Will Eisner's last work - The Plot: The Secret Story of the Protocols of the Elders of Zion
RDCW Profile

"Well, as it happens, I wrote the damned SOP," Illescue half snarled, "and as of now, you can bar those jackals from any part of this facility until Hell's a hockey rink! Is that perfectly clear?!" - Dr. Franz Illescue - Honor Harrington: At All Costs

"I don't know what I'm do, or how I do, I just do." - Alexander Ovechkin</sub>
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Velo's in the ring, addressing the audience as the RDCW Champion for the first time, getting a mixed reaction

"Hey now...this one goes out to my niggaz left in the slamma, from St. Louis to Memphis, from Texas back up to Indiana, Chi-Town, K.C., Motown to Alabama, L.A., New York Yankees niggaz to Hotlanta, 'ouisiana, to all of my niggaz wit' country grammar!

"I believe I'm the first Midwestern boy to win a major title since Verne Gagne...

"A lot of surprised people after last week, that's for damn sure! I bet people started feeling pretty safe, seeing my name on the card, with my career on the line against Drzsmith. The poof and theproctor apparently forgot that I've feuded with the best of them with everything on the line! It was nothing new to me! I'm used to the all or nothing feuds! I've always been one of the best, but on that night, I became the best of the best! And don't none of you forget it.

"I'm going into the biggest event in the history of our sport as the RDCW Champion now. There are a lot of people that are gunning for me now, and I can't say that I blame them. There are a lot of worthy opponents...PJP? No, not him. I know if I were PJP, I'd be a registered sex offender, sitting backstage, wondering how I just beat a guy who won the big title, and am stuck facing a couple of newbies! It's simple, really. PJP can't win without massive amounts of NwO interference. Until he can, he'll never be on the level of those like me and Drzsmith!

"And then there's Snarf:



"Earlier tonight, getting back to my point about worthy opponents, Nowherepoof was out here, and to be honest, I wasn't really paying much attention. He was saying something about thinking about long and hard ones, and taking shots from big ones, and I just figured he was reading to us all from his dream log again. Then somebody told me he went and booked a six man main event for the biggest show in the history of our sport! For the first time possibly ever, I think Nowhereman actually did something right!

"Now, everyone thinks that putting me against five opponents instead of one puts me at a disadvantage. Y'all forget, it ain't my job to beat them, it's their job to beat me!

"This will certainly be a match for the ages, six legends in the biggest match on the biggest night! You got me, of course...and you got Drzsmith, who definitely deserves a rematch. He fought cleanly and honorably, and on any given night is still the best in the company. Hell, ROY BATTY and bsams taught me pretty much everything I know about this business! LLance is an immovable object. JQ...well, I don't know how he got into this match, but five out of six ain't bad.

"I'm realist. I know how lucky I am to be champion, and that my first title defense could very well be my last. That's perfectly fine with me. You won't see me running from any threats. You jesters wanna try to steal my crown, go ahead. But you'll have to remember, as Nowhereman and theproctor clearly forgot, that I'm a legend who's among the best of them, and you can never take that away from me!" Velo throws the mic down as his music starts back up to another mixed reaction.


And that's terrible.
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Audience chant: "LYING DELETER.........LYING DELETER.......LYING DELETER...."

Nöwheremän #268620 2004-03-12 12:01 AM
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* At a payphone outside the Cheesedome, we see Latino Heat. He is talking to someone. . .


EGW? Yeah, it's me, ese. The Doctor made the match! That's right, next week, me against Darth in a lucha libre rules, crackhead lumberjack match! Call Muerte, call "Dirty" Pete, call everybody! Next week Darth is gonna feel the wrath of El Loco Luchas!

*show goes to commercial*


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I stand astride my fallen victims like a colossus.

Who among my fellow RDCW wrestlers can say that they have grappled with six other men and come out on top. Who among you has left a pile of groaning, sweating bodies heaped in the middle of the ring?

Remember stay in school and say no to drugs.

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you like sweating groaning bodies in a heap?

PJP #268623 2004-03-12 2:33 AM
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backwards7 to his parole officer, after the fight:

"Yeah Winged Creature just stood in the corner and wept like a bitch. Yeah, I did the 'Say no to drugs, stay in school speech.' That's another 30 seconds off my five year community service sentence, right?"

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Quote:

Kristogar Velo said:
Velo's in the ring, addressing the audience as the RDCW Champion for the first time, getting a mixed reaction

"Hey now...this one goes out to my niggaz left in the slamma, from St. Louis to Memphis, from Texas back up to Indiana, Chi-Town, K.C., Motown to Alabama, L.A., New York Yankees niggaz to Hotlanta, 'ouisiana, to all of my niggaz wit' country grammar!

"I believe I'm the first Midwestern boy to win a major title since Verne Gagne...

"A lot of surprised people after last week, that's for damn sure! I bet people started feeling pretty safe, seeing my name on the card, with my career on the line against Drzsmith. The poof and theproctor apparently forgot that I've feuded with the best of them with everything on the line! It was nothing new to me! I'm used to the all or nothing feuds! I've always been one of the best, but on that night, I became the best of the best! And don't none of you forget it.

"I'm going into the biggest event in the history of our sport as the RDCW Champion now. There are a lot of people that are gunning for me now, and I can't say that I blame them. There are a lot of worthy opponents...PJP? No, not him. I know if I were PJP, I'd be a registered sex offender, sitting backstage, wondering how I just beat a guy who won the big title, and am stuck facing a couple of newbies! It's simple, really. PJP can't win without massive amounts of NwO interference. Until he can, he'll never be on the level of those like me and Drzsmith!

"And then there's Snarf:



"Earlier tonight, getting back to my point about worthy opponents, Nowherepoof was out here, and to be honest, I wasn't really paying much attention. He was saying something about thinking about long and hard ones, and taking shots from big ones, and I just figured he was reading to us all from his dream log again. Then somebody told me he went and booked a six man main event for the biggest show in the history of our sport! For the first time possibly ever, I think Nowhereman actually did something right!

"Now, everyone thinks that putting me against five opponents instead of one puts me at a disadvantage. Y'all forget, it ain't my job to beat them, it's their job to beat me!

"This will certainly be a match for the ages, six legends in the biggest match on the biggest night! You got me, of course...and you got Drzsmith, who definitely deserves a rematch. He fought cleanly and honorably, and on any given night is still the best in the company. Hell, ROY BATTY and bsams taught me pretty much everything I know about this business! LLance is an immovable object. JQ...well, I don't know how he got into this match, but five out of six ain't bad.

"I'm realist. I know how lucky I am to be champion, and that my first title defense could very well be my last. That's perfectly fine with me. You won't see me running from any threats. You jesters wanna try to steal my crown, go ahead. But you'll have to remember, as Nowhereman and theproctor clearly forgot, that I'm a legend who's among the best of them, and you can never take that away from me!" Velo throws the mic down as his music starts back up to another mixed reaction.


Kristogar you ever need any help........I got your back.......Let's form the Unholy Alliance.

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...da fuck? I'm not in the quasi-greatest show in the greater metropolitan area?! I'm the Last Bastion of the African Experience, dammit!

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The lights go out. When they return, Darth appears behind TK. TK turns around.

TK: Oh shit.

Darth: So, you want to be in a match. So do I.

There is a long pause. TK doesn't know what to do. He looks at Darth, who just stands there. Motionless. Then:

Darth: Latine Cheat! You want a match with Darth? Why wait till the next Havoc, you little chicken shit? How about you and whoever you were talking to on that phone meet TK and me in a cage match at Roblemania? Or are you chicken? I'll be there. (Looks at TK.) I'm sure TK will be there. Are you game?

The lights go out. When they return, Darth is gone.

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Quote:

Darth said:
The lights go out. When they return, Darth appears behind TK. TK turns around.

TK: Oh shit.

Darth: So, you want to be in a match. So do I.

There is a long pause. TK doesn't know what to do. He looks at Darth, who just stands there. Motionless. Then:

Darth: Latine Cheat! You want a match with Darth? Why wait till the next Havoc, you little chicken shit? How about you and whoever you were talking to on that phone meet TK and me in a cage match at Roblemania? Or are you chicken? I'll be there. (Looks at TK.) I'm sure TK will be there. Are you game?

The lights go out. When they return, Darth is gone.




I read this, thinking "TK's gonna catch a BEATdowwwwwwwwwnnnn..."

Nice fake-out. Great promo. I'm taking notes here. Whatta great match!



Uschi said:
I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry.

MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost!

"I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock

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Quote:

Darth: Latine Cheat! You want a match with Darth? Why wait till the next Havoc, you little chicken shit? How about you and whoever you were talking to on that phone meet TK and me in a cage match at Roblemania? Or are you chicken? I'll be there. (Looks at TK.) I'm sure TK will be there. Are you game?





*The Cheese-O-Tron sparks to life as Latino Heat's image appears.*


Ohh, nooo, no, ese. You see, holmes, you don't just jump people in the middle of the ring and then disappear. You got a lotta nerve calling me a chicken shit. Besides, I think PJP already challenged you to a match for RobbleMania.

We gonna do this my way. You want some Latino Heat? You gonna wait till next week's Havoc, ese.

*Latino Heat pats his toy belt* Arriba la raza!

*steps into his lowrider and drives off as the Cheese-O-Tron fades out*


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A sinister laugh is heard over the speakers. The lights go out. There is an explosion in the ring. The lights come on, and Darth is standing there. He is holding something in his hands.

Darth: Latino Chicken Shit. I knew you would back out. That's why I gave you a tag partner. You see, Backwards 7 hasn't yet agreed to invite me to share in his title shot. And why would he. No, he's smarter than that. He wants PJP all to himself.

There is a pause.

Darth: I, on the other hand, could care less about PJP, or his title. I didn't attack him to get a title shot. I attacked him because he was there. You, Latino Chicken Shit, I attacked you because you're a fraud. A nobody. A weasel. And you're proving it right now. But that's OK. You won't get very far...holmes. Not without these.

Darth holds out his hands and opens them. A number of lug nuts fall to the mat. The exact number cannot be determined. But it is clear that they are from Latino Heat's lowrider. As the last one hits, the lights go out and there is another explosion. When they return, Darth is gone.


*The cheese-o-tron shows an image of Latino Heat's lowrider making a turn out of the parking structure, when it's left front wheel falls off. The lowrider skids to a stop. Asside from the vehicle itself, no one is hurt.*

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Who was that masked douchebag?

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Dude he messed with his car......between two guys that's real personal.

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This forum is dead.


now known as rex

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