Okay, so the execs at Warner Bros. are still playing Round Robin with the directors, and Peters is still on board. For those of you who didn't know, Peters has a long time reputation for ripping off other people's stuff from whatever movie he's just seen. So if we use our imaginations and use this to try and picture how Peters can really screw up this movie even more, we can come up with some really funny shit here. For example, what would the Superman movie be like if Peters had just seen (note - I'm usng stuff from Kevin Smith's "Superman Lives" screenplay and J.J. Abram's proposed script)...
* BROKEN ARROW *
Superman and Lex Luthor engage in a five minue gunfight with neither of them hitting the other while a nuclear bomb prepares to go off. Luthor runs out of bullets and Superman readies his gun.
SUPERMAN: Come on out, Lex! It's over!
Luthor comes out of hiding with his finger on the button for the nuke activation device.
SUPERMAN: You lose.
LUTHOR: I still have my finger on the trigger! See, if i push this button here, you lose! If I push this button here, the weapon is disarmed.
SUPERMAN: Why don't you disarm it, then?
LUTHOR: I'm not in the mood. Now get rid of your weapon. Get rid of your weapon...come on!
Superman drops his gun.
LUTHOR: Attaboy! Now you can shut it down if you want. You just have to come and get it. And twenty dollars that I took from you last night says that you won't.
Luthor takes a fighting stance.
SUPERMAN: You're out of your mind.
LUTHOR: Yeah. Ain't it cool?
SUPERMAN: I'm serious, Luthor, you're mind's taken a walk off a map.
LUTHOR: Maybe...but I'm still gonna kick your ass!
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* E.T. *
Superman prepares to return to Krypton. A tearful Lois begs him to stay. Superman extends a finger towards her and it begins to glow.
SUPERMAN: I'll be right back. Be gooooood, Lois...
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* RUN LOLA RUN *
Superman and Doomsday are facing off against each other, staring each other down. They suddenly morph into cartoons as techno music begins to play. Suddenly Doomsday beats up on Superman and delivers a fatal blow. the camera zooms in on a closeup of Superman's dead face, and the scene dissolves into a flashback of Superman and Lois in bed
SUPERMAN: Lois, do you love me?
LOIS: Huh?
SUPERMAN: Do you love me?
LOIS: Of course I do.
SUPERMAN: How do you know?
LOIS: How does anyone know?
SUPERMAN: If I died tomorrow, what would you do?
LOIS: Superman, you're not dead yet.
Dissolve to Superman and a Thanagarian Snare Beast facing off against each other, with Lois as a prisoner. Techno music beings to play as the scene morphs into a cartoon. The Thanagarian Snare Beast goes for Lois, impaling her on one of its appendages. The scene shifts back to normal as the camera zooms in on Lois's dead face, and we get another flashback of Superman and Lois in bed.
LOIS: Superman, do you love me?
SUPERMAN: Huh?
LOIS: Do you love me?
SUPERMAN: Of course I do.
LOIS: How do you know?
SUPERMAN: How does anyone know?
LOIS: If I died tomorrow, what would you do?
SUPERMAN: Lois, you're not dead yet.
Dissolve to Superman and Brainiac facing off. The scene becomes a cartoon as Superman shoves his fist through Brainiac's robot body and Brainiac falls apart. The scene returns to normal as the camera zooms in on Brainiac's deactivated head. Dissolve to Brainiac and L-Ron in bed together.
L-RON: Brainiac, do you love me?
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That's all I can think of for now. I'll post some more when I thin of them. Anybody have any others?
