RKMBs Forums .::Important::. off topic and offensive posts WTF

What happened to all the late night activity here??!??!??!?!

Rob is too busy these days to log into his alts.

burp

and how!

because he spent lamb and rimjob month in a cigar factory with carrot stains in his ear

Three Dog Night -
Joy to the World


Jeremiah was a bullfrog
Was a good friend of mine
I never understood a single word he said
But I helped him a-drink his wine
And he always had some mighty fine wine
Singin'...

Joy to the world
All the boys and girls now
Joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea
Joy to you and me

If I were the king of the world
Tell you what I'd do
I'd throw away the cars and the bars and the war
Make sweet love to you
Sing it now...

Joy to the world
All the boys and girls
Joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea
Joy to you and me

[electric piano]

You know I love the ladies
Love to have my fun
I'm a high life flyer and a rainbow rider
A straight shootin' son-of-a-gun
I said a straight shootin' son-of-a-gun

Joy to the world
All the boys and girls
Joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea
Joy to you and me

I wanna tell you
Joy to the world
All the boys and girls
Joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea
Joy to you and me

Joy to the world
All the boys and girls
Joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea
Joy to you and me

[fading]
Joy to the world
All the boys and girls

The Cisco Kid
War

The Cisco Kid was a friend of mine
The Cisco Kid was a friend of mine
He drink whiskey, Poncho drink the wine
He drink whiskey, Poncho drink the wine

We met down on the fort of Rio Grande
We met down on the fort of Rio Grande
Eat the salted peanuts out of can
Eat the salted peanuts out the can

The outlaws had us pinned down at the fort
The outlaws had us pinned down at the fort
Cisco came in blastin', drinkin' port
Cisco came in blastin', drinkin' port

They rode the sunset, horse was made of steel
They rode the sunset, horse was made of steel
Chased a gringo last night through a field
Chased a gringo last night through a field

The Cisco Kid was a friend of mine
The Cisco Kid he was a friend of mine
The Cisco Kid was a friend of mine
The Cisco Kid was a friend of mine

The Cisco Kid was a friend of mine
The Cisco Kid he was a friend of mine
The Cisco Kid was a friend of mine
The Cisco Kid was a friend of mine

The Cisco Kid he was a friend of mine
The Cisco Kid he was a friend of mine
The Cisco Kid he was a friend of mine
{fade}

I was the only one here at too early in the am so I just stopped coming! Bastichs!

Grandpa pissed his pants again
He don't give a damn
Brother Billy has both guns drawn
He ain't been right since Viet Nam
"Sweet Home Alabama"
Play that dead band's song
Turn those speakers up full blast
Play it all night long
Daddy's doing Sister Sally
Grandma's dying of cancer now
The cattle all have brucellosis
We'll get through somehow
"Sweet Home Alabama"
Play that dead band's song
Turn those speakers up full blast
Play it all night long
I'm going down to the Dew Drop Inn
See if I can drink enough
There ain't much to country living
Sweat, piss, jizz and blood
"Sweet Home Alabama"
Play that dead band's song
Turn those speakers up full blast
Play it all night long

A love ballad for me! I knew you really cared all this time Franta!

“I can’t help looking gay. I put on a dress and people say,
‘Who’s the dyke in the dress?’” - Karen Ripley

“Pronouns make it hard to keep our sexual orientation a
secret when our co-workers ask us about our weekend.
‘I had a great time with ….THEM.’Great! Now they don’t think you’re queer ~ just a bigslut!” - Judy Carter

“Men often say, ‘Women! Who could ever understand them?’
Don’t ask a lesbian for the answer.
All you’ll get is a sympathetic nod.” - Joanne Brigden

“My mom blames California for being a lesbian.
‘Everything was fine until you moved out there.’
‘That’s right, Mom, we have mandatory lesbianism in West
Hollywood.The Gay Patrol busted me, and I was given seven business
days to add a significant amount of flannel to my
wardrobe.” - Coley Sohn

“If homosexuality is a disease, lets all call in queer to
work‘Hello. Can’t work today, still queer’.” - Robin Tyler

“A woman goes to the gynecologist, and upon examination,
the doctor says, ‘Why, it’s immaculate in here! What do you
do to keep yourself so hygenic?’The woman responds, ‘I have a woman in twice a week.’”

“My partner and I joined a support group for monogamous
lesbians - it was great until she met someone there.”
-Margo Gomez

“When my mother found out I was gay she sent me to Juvenile
Hall.That’s smart. Sending me to live with five hundred girls
who can’t get out!” - Kat Howard

Lesbian is a term most widely used in the English language to describe sexual and romantic desire between females. The word may be used as a noun, to refer to women who identify themselves or who may be identified by others as having the primary attribute of female homosexuality. It may also be used as an adjective to describe characteristics of an object or activity as related to female same-sex desire.Although female homosexuality has appeared in many cultures throughout time, not until recently has lesbian described a group of people. In the late 19th century sexologists published their observations on same-sex desire and behavior, designating lesbians in Western culture as a unique entity. As a result, women who became aware of their new medical status formed underground subcultures in Europe and North America. Further broadening of the term occurred in the 1970s, influenced by second wave feminism. Historians since have re-examined relationships between women in history, and have questioned what qualifies a woman or a relationship as lesbian.

William Shakespeare's Romeo + Juliet is an Academy Award-nominated 1996 American film and the 10th on-screen adaptation of William Shakespeare's romantic tragedy of the same name. It was directed by Australian Baz Luhrmann and stars Leonardo DiCaprio and Claire Danes in the eponymous roles. The film is a modernization of Shakespeare's play, designed to appeal to a younger modern audience. The warring families (the Montagues and the Capulets) are represented as warring business empires and swords are replaced by guns. Despite the adaptation, the film retains Shakespeare's original dialogue, albeit edited down for modern cinema audiences.

Romeo & Juliet
Dire Straits


A lovestruck romeo sings a streetsus serenade
Laying everybody low with me a lovesong that he made
Finds a convenient streetlight steps out of the shade
Says something like you and me babe how about it ?

Juliet says hey its romeo you nearly gimme a heart attack
Hes underneath the window shes singing hey la my boyfriends back
You shouldnt come around here singing up at people like that
Anyway what you gonna do about it ?

Juliet the dice were loaded from the start
And I bet and you exploded in my heart
And I forget the movie song
When you wanna realise it was just that the time was wrong juliet ?

Come up on differents streets they both were streets of shame
Both dirty both mean yes and the dream was just the same
And I dreamed your dream for you and your dream is real
How can you look at me as if I was just another one of your deals ?

Where you can fall for chains of silver you can fall for chains of gold
You can fall for pretty strangers and the promises they hold
You promised me everything you promised me think and thin
Now you just says oh romeo yeah you know I used to have a scene with him

Juliet when we made love you used to cry
You said I love you like the stars above Ill love you till I die
Theres a place for us you know the movie song
When you gonna realise it was just that the time was wrong juliet ?

I cant do the talk like they talk on tv
And I cant do a love song like the way its meant to be
I cant do everything but Id do anything for you
I cant do anything except be in love with you

And all I do is miss you and the way we used to be
All do is keep the beat and bad company
All I do is kiss you through the bars of a rhyme
Julie Id do the stars with you any time

Juliet when we made love you used to cry
You said I love you like the stars above Ill love you till I die
Theres a place for us you know the movie song
When you gonna realise it was just that the time was wrong juliet ?

A lovestruck romeo sings a streetsus serenade
Laying everybody low with me a lovesong that he made
Finds a convenient streetlight steps out of the shade
Says something like you and me babe how about it ?

How to Photograph Sports in Low Light
Step1
Connect an external flash to your camera if it has the capability. If your camera cannot be used with an external flash, set it up to use the built-in flash. The more powerful flash you use, the farther you can be from your subject and still light it.
Step2
If using an external flash, turn up the shutter speed on your camera as high as it will go. On many cameras, this can be done by setting the mode dial to shutter priority ("S" on Nikon cameras) and spinning the shutter speed wheel to the right. Different cameras can sync the flash with different shutter speeds; 500 is the highest I've seen. You may need to adjust shutter speed, depending on the speed of the moving subject and the power of your flash. Don't be afraid to experiment. If your camera doesn't have an adjustable shutter speed, set the camera to sports mode.
Step3
Get in as close as possible to the subject and aim your camera as the action happens. In basketball, some of the best photographs are taken from beneath the net or nearby from the sidelines.Taking pictures from above, such as on a balcony,will have more favorable light. For wrestling, sitting on the far corner of the mat can produce some good action photos. Just get as close as youcan without getting in the way of the player or officials and crouch down if you are positioned in front of spectators.

Step4
As you photograph, check out the pictures on your camera's digital screen. Play with flash and shutter settings to adjust the brightness and blur of the picture. Many external flashes have an increase/decrease flash control,sometimes denoted by a + and -.

Step5
Turning up the camera's ISO (digital film speed) will produce brighter shots with less of a flash, but each increase in ISO will produce a more "grainy" shot. On many cameras, the default ISO is 200. Increase ISO paringly, but if you are too far away or don't have a flash, crank up the ISO.

Step6
Using a "fast" lens (a lens with a high aperture) will allow more light to come into the camera and make brighter pictures while using less flash. Another effect of using a higher aperture is a shallow depth of field, which can produce a nice effect, but makes it so if you are slightly off focus of the subject, it will appear out of focus. Lenses with a high aperture are useful, but can be pricey.

Glory glory hallelujah
Teacher hit me with a ruler
I met her at the door with a loaded .44
Now the teacher don't teach no more!

I have seen the glory of the burning of the school
we have tortured every teacher,
we have broken every rule
we have barbecued the principal,
destroyed the PTA,
our school keeps burning on

Glory, glory hallelujah.
Teacher hit me with a ruler.
Met her at the door with a magnum .44
Now there ain't no teacher no more.

Scooby dooby doo, took a poo,
Shaggy thought it was candy.
Shaggy took a bite,
his balls turned white.
That's the end of poor shaggy.


Pepsi cola came to town. Coca-Cola
shot him down. Dr. Pepper fixed him
up. Now we're drinking 7-up. 7-up
caught the flu. Now we're drinking
Mountain Dew. Mountain Dew caught it
too... NOW WE DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!?