Originally Posted By: thedoctor
 Originally Posted By: Joe Mama
Another reason Trek is gay: how is Bones NOT the hero of that series???


Exactly. Fuck Kirk. Fuck Spock. Fuck Picard and his bitchy crew. Star Trek needed only one character. Leonard 'Bones' McCoy. Just for scriptwriting formula sake, make Scotty his sidekick. Shit happens, they go get fucked up drunk, Scotty makes the Enterprise blow up suns while McCoy has cured the universe's most deadly virus. The show ends with Scotty humping Uhura over her console and Yeoman Rand straddling McCoy on the Captain's chair. Every week.


Y'know what? Fuck the whole concept of Trek. Just make a series about McCoy and Scotty drunkenly road-tripping through space. They steal a Federation-class ship with bare bones, all-female crew and blast through space, ripping shit up and raising hell.

If we MUST have some of the members of the old show on, Harry Mudd can sell them a bad batch of Space Cialis that causes them to hallucinate even as their libidos go unchecked. Key line from that episode:

 Quote:
Harry Mudd: You raped my Tribbles! You raped ALL my Tribbles!!!


Y'want Khan? I'll give you Khan! Khan - a superhuman space pimp - steals aboard the ship, trying to turn out the entire crew and recreate his race while turning mad profit. McCoy and Scotty get wise to what's going on, beat Khan's arse, toss him in a locker, and launch it (and the Genesis Device they won in a poker game) at some planet. Key exchange:

 Quote:
Random crew member lady: Was it such a good idea, sending Khan to that planet with an unknown technology and a grudge toward you both?

McCoy & Scotty (drunk as hell): What could go wrong???


Do the whole series like that. It's a mix of Trek, Hunter S. Thompson, and every great buddy/road trip flick ever! Have Scotty fuck a fat, black chick and hang her panties on his teleporter control panel. Maybe McCoy decides not to nail one of those green broads cuz "she's not ripe yet," but fucks her anyway by the end of the episode. Scotty could wake up after a night of blackout drinking next to one of those lizard creatures and have to explain to McCoy why his cock's all scaly (Lizard People VD). The possibilities are endless!

Uschi said:
I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry.

MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost!

"I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock

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