Quote:

Grimm said:
"But first, I want to talk about. . ." *looks over at Snarf.*

". . .Joe Mama."

"Joe Mama is an untested rookie. Joe Mama walked up in here asking for title shots without paying his dues. Joe Mama jumped ahead in line. Joe Mama wants to put himself on a pedestal and compare himself to King Snarf? King Snarf was serving out beatdowns in the Smackdown Cafe while Joe Mama was still breastfeeding!"

"So, Joe Mama wants a match with Snarf? Well, I have a proposal for you. Get up off your knees, it's not the kind of proposal you're used to hearing in the showers from Nowhereman and his pals. You want to face Snarf? Then you do it an Asylum Rules match. This is a match of my own devising where you, Joe Mama, will face The Triple Set in a handicap match. Not just any handicap match. You see, we will have weapons in this match. Kendo sticks, chairs, you name it. We'll be allowed to use them. You, on the other hand, just to even things out, will NOT be allowed to use your finishing moves. That means no Flying Tea Bag Slam and no Joe Mama Lock. That means we get to pummel you with blunt objects three on one, and you get no finishing moves. So think about it, Joe. We'll be waiting for your answer."



Ben Harper's Faded plays over the loudspeakers...

A determined Joe Mama walks to the ring, mike in hand...

Cut the music!

Y'know, I've been incredibly insensitive towards the Triple-Su...uh, Set, in the last couple of weeks. I referred to them as faggots, pussies, and stupid among other things. Listening to Grimm just now...well, I didn't realize: you guys are all either deaf or retarded, aren't yez???

The crowd goes wild

Now, I'm not one to make fun of those with actual handicaps, so I'll just apologize for the cruel and heartless comments that were previously made.

Let's review what's really occurred since my arrival and - Triple-Set? - I'll talk extra slow and even use sign language to help you mor...uh, gentlemen, understand.

Starts "signing" with one hand...

Demanded a title shot? No...asked for a chance to compete in front of the amazing fans of the RDCW. Jumped ahead in line? No... was blessed with a title shot by the real GM of this fine promotion: Nowhereman. Demanded a shot at Quee...King Snarf? No...was rudely interrupted and responded by issuing a challenge, then made an appearance at the end of his botched intergender tag match to show my seriousness.

Maybe that was the defining moment. Maybe by appearing out of nowhere scared King Snarf to the point that he's needed to dodge me ever since. Maybe that's why The Doctor booked him in any match but with me. Maybe that's the reason I'm wrestling LLance tonight instead of the Snarfster. And that's okay...I'll pay whatever dues it takes to establish myself here in the RDCW. No sweat...

But now we have an "Asylum Rules" match? One man, no finishers, against an armed group of the mentally handicapped? Is this what it takes to get a match against King Snarf? Do I scare you guys that badly?

You know what? It doesn't matter. Get the contract and the pen ready, boys, because I'm signing onto this match! Not because I think I have any chance at winning...I KNOW you knuckl...gentlemen will be nearly unstoppable when armed. Not because I have some plan to have the other members of the NwO retaliate. I'm asking them not to get involved. No...I'm signing onto this match to prove to you all that I WILL NOT BE STOPPED!!! You beat me, you'll batter me...you may even bludgeon me to the point of brain damage, but I'll keep coming back. I'll keep demanding my match with Snarf and there's NOTHING you can do about it! Keep hiding from me, Snarf...but know that every hit I take, every injury that the 'Set inflicts upon me will be returned to you ten-fold. Forget beating you, King Snarf...I'm taking you OUT!!!

Ball's in your court, gentlemen. I'll be here all night, ready to sign on the line...now HIT MY MUSIC!!!

Last edited by Joe Mama; 2004-02-26 9:20 PM.
Uschi said:
I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry.

MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost!

"I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock

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