Hello, fans, this is Mike "The Mouth" Monroe here to give you the run down on tonight's high octane action.

Havoc started out with yet another title defense by the soon to be legendary PJP. So far he has squashed every opponent sent his way, and Penwing was no different. Is there a competitor in the Lightweight division who can take down PJP?

Next was the Gorilla Press Slam match between Joe Mama and veteran LLance. Surprisingly, Joe Mama was able to hold his own in the ring. Even more shocking was his display of raw strength as he was able to complete TWO gorilla presses on LLance. Unfortunately, a third was not in the cards for Joe. LLance finally began to fight back and deliver three brutal slams, the last to the outside of the ring, to win the match and send this young upstart to the hospital.

The third event was the one everyone's been waiting for, the Beauty Contest. All the RDCW beauties were there, but so was the CEO, Rob Kamphausen .

Rob Kamphausen: I have had my lawyers examine the rules to this contest thoroughly, and they have informed me that there is not one single clause stating that a RDCW beauty cannot have a penis.

With that, Kamphausen entered himself into the competition. No one had seriously considered him being able to walk away crowned as RDCW's princess until the swimsuit segment where the Issue9mm judges gave him straight ten's. But in the end, it was Cowgirl Jack to become crowned over Women's Champ Stareena and rival for the belt Butterrican.

Then, we were onto the Heavyweight Title match between reigning champion Drzsmith and young hopeful TK-069. This was one of the most brutal matches I have ever seen. Both men clobbered each other senseless for the right to wear the gold. TK was setting up his finishing move, the Cleveland Steamer, when Drzsmith pulled the official, Jack the lil Death, in the way. This caused enough of a distraction for the champ to use his trusted slapjack to insure his victory and retain his title.

And, finally, the much anticipated 6-man Table Elimination match with Tornado Tag rules between the Triple Set and the NwO. If they were to win, the Set would get a shot at the tag belts around the Aussies Scumbags' wastes at Robblemania. If they lost, tag team gold would not be in their future anytime soon. To add to the tension, The Doctor, rival GM to Nowhereman, had banned himself from ringside during the match and added a DQ clause to the match. On top of that, he entered his own former tag team partner, Lothar, as the Special Referee of the match.

As soon as the bell rang, all hell broke loose in the ring. This was one of the most brutal matches I've ever witnessed in my 20 years in this business........... also........... I was including that last match as well, of course. For five straight minutes, each man was doing his best to beat the tar out of his opponent. There was too much going on for any real team strategy to be put into play. Dave found himself being powerbombed by Doc. Mid-Nite through a table on the outside of the ring, eliminating him. Grimm successfully Irish whipped Nowhereman onto a table set up on a turnbuckle and followed up with a splash that sent the GM through to be eliminated. But hold on! Special Referee, Lothar, was too busy being locked up in the middle of a two-way beat down Aussie Danny was receiving from King Snarf and Doc. Mid-Nite to make the call. Grimm joined in on the beat down, unaware that Nowhereman was still a legal particpant in the match. With a moonsault from King Snarf, Danny was eliminated from the match.

The Triple Set began to celebrate their victory just too soon. Nowhereman knocked Grimm to the mat with a missle dropkick from behind. King Snarf was then tossed over the top rope and through a table set up at the edge of the ring. Mid-Nite and Nowhereman are the only two men left standing. They went at it like wild badgers, trading blows. Victory once again seemed to be in the hands of the Triple Set as Doc. prepared to super-plex Nowhereman from the top turnbuckle into an awaiting table. Once again, Nowhereman regaieds his composure and used an augmented version of the Rock Bottom through the table.

Grimm came to his senses. The two men, their current hatred of each other well known throughout the RDCW, prepared to commence one on one battle. Lothar became distracted by an excited female fan on the front row wearing a really tight Triple Set t-shirt. At the peak of the in ring drama, you'd never believe what happened next.

*Footage of the match without commentary is played. The Doctor slides into the ring with a steel chair in hand between Grimm and Nowhereman. Strong words are exchanged between the two GMs. The Doctor raises his chair over his head right as Lothar is turning back to the match. The Doctor spins and brings the chair down to gingerly tap Grimm on the top of the head. After a few seconds pass, Grimm's eyes shut and his body falls limp to the mat. Lothar becomes outraged and calls for the bell.*

James White: In concurrence with the no interference rule, the winners by disqualification........ THE TRIPLE SET!

*As Nowhereman gets ready to throw a punch, Azrael slides into the ring behind Nowhereman and gives him a Crapping Wizard. They all begin to put boots to Nowhereman. The Doctor grabs a mic.*

The Doctor: You see, Nowhereman? This is MY show. I make the rules here. I am in control. And don't you ever forget that.

*The Doctor rolls out of the ring as it fills with NwO and Power Trip members. Men pummel each other with lefts, rights, and kicks as the cameras fade to black.*