|
|
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 24,106
faggot 15000+ posts
|
|
faggot 15000+ posts
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 24,106 |
Power cords need love, just like anyone else. They get entangled as they meet new cords and engage in romantically pursuing them. But power cords are notoriously fickle and are often getting themselves into trouble by trying to court many other cords at one time, or cheating on the cord they promised themselves to for eternity with some hot young biddy of a cord... perhaps that of a new toaster, music device, or electric shaving tool. After a certain length of time, it is likely that the various deeds and misdeeds of your power cords will leave them (and their lives) in a horrible mess.
One can nip this phenomenon in the bud, however. The use of wires or straps can be helpful in binding the cords into one mass community. The closeness of the cords from the start, and the way they have no means of escape, means they are forced into open polygamy/polyandry and are less likely to be forced into a tangled mess.
Pariah wraps them around his breasts during foreplay. If you ever see an electrical cord that is tangled around Pariah's breasts, please be sure to plug it in and drop it into a puddle of water.
Old men, fear me! You will shatter under my ruthless apathetic assault!
Uschi - 2
Old Men - 0
"I am convinced that this world is of no importance, and that the only people who care about dates are imbeciles and Spanish teachers." -- Jean Arp, 1921
"If Jesus came back and saw what people are doing in his name, he would never never stop throwing up." - Max von Sydow, "Hannah and Her Sisters"
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 30,833 Likes: 7
The conscience of the rkmbs! 15000+ posts
|
|
The conscience of the rkmbs! 15000+ posts
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 30,833 Likes: 7 |
Pariah wraps them around his breasts during foreplay. If you ever see an electrical cord that is tangled around Pariah's breasts, please be sure to plug it in and drop it into a puddle of water. Does wonders for my nippies.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
|
|
The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
Bruce Springsteen
The Wrestler
Have you ever seen a one trick pony in the field so happy and free?
If you've ever seen a one trick pony then you've seen me
Have you ever seen a one-legged dog making its way down the street?
If you've ever seen a one-legged dog then you've seen me
Then you've seen me, I come and stand at every door
Then you've seen me, I always leave with less than I had before
Then you've seen me, bet I can make you smile when the blood, it hits the floor
Tell me, fan, can you ask for anything more?
Tell me can you ask for anything more?
Have you ever seen a scarecrow filled with nothing but dust and wheat?
If you've ever seen that scarecrow then you've seen me
Have you ever seen a one-armed man punching at nothing but the breeze?
If you've ever seen a one-armed man then you've seen me
Then you've seen me, I come and stand at every door
Then you've seen me, I always leave with less than I had before
Then you've seen me, bet I can make you smile when the blood, it hits the floor
Tell me, friend, can you ask for anything more?
Tell me can you ask for anything more?
These things that have comforted me, I drive away
This place that is my home I cannot pay
My only faith's in the broken bones and bruises I display
Have you ever seen a one-legged man trying to dance his way free?
If you've ever seen a one-legged man then you've seen me
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
|
|
The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
"We could be somewhere where you would never expect anyone to know him and someone would walk up and say 'Bon Scott!' and always have a beer for him"
Angus Young
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
|
|
The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
"I saw all the women and I figured that looked good. I was horney. I got a guitar off my brother and started playing anything"
Angus Young
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
|
|
The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
The Farmers Curst Wife
A farmer was ploughing his field one day,
Riteful, riteful, titty fie day,
A farmer was ploughing his field one day
When the devil came up, and to him did say,
With a riteful la, titty fie day,
Riteful, riteful, titty fie day.
See here, my good man, I have come for your wife,
Riteful, riteful, titty fie day,
See here, my good man I have come for your wife,
For she's the bane and torment of your life,
With a riteful la, titty fie day,
Riteful, riteful, titty fie day.
So the Devil he hoisted her up on his hump,
Riteful, riteful, titty fie day,
So the Devil he hoisted her up on his hump,
And down to Hell with her he did jump,
With a riteful la, titty fie day,
Riteful, riteful, titty fie day.
When they got there the gates they were shut,
Riteful, riteful, titty fie day,
When they got there the gates they were shut,
With a blow of her hand she laid open his nut,
With a riteful la, titty fie day,
Riteful, riteful, titty fie day.
Two little devils were playing handball,
Riteful, riteful, titty fie day,
Two little devils were playing handball,
Take her back Daddy, she'll be the death of us all!
With a riteful la, titty fie day,
Riteful, riteful, titty fie day.
So the Devil he hoisted her up on his hump,
Riteful, riteful, titty fie day,
So the Devil he hoisted her up on his hump,
And back to earth with her he did jump,
With a riteful la, titty fie day,
Riteful, riteful, titty fie day.
See here, my good man, I have come with your wife,
Riteful, riteful, titty fie day,
See here, my good man, I have come with your wife,
For she's the bane and torment of my life.
With a riteful la, titty fie day,
Riteful, riteful, titty fie day.
Now they say that the women are worse than the men,
Riteful, riteful, titty fie day,
They say that the women are worse than the men,
They went down to Hell and got kicked out again.
With a riteful la, titty fie day,
Riteful, riteful, titty fie day.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
|
|
The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
The Decieved Maid
As she walked past the jailhouse door,
She spied a man with head hung low,
And all because of bolts and bars,
His homeland he would never know.
'I am a prisoner far from home,
But if you'll only steal the key,
I'll take you were the grass grows green,
And make of you a great lady.'
'I cannot go, I will not go,
And be your great lady,
For you have got a Scotland wife,
And you've got babies three.'
She's done to her father's stable,
She's done to her mother's till,
She's got the jailhouse key so large,
And she's galloped o'er the hill.
And as they galloped o'er the plain,
It was "my dearling dear,"
But as they came to Scotland,
Well changed was this cheer.
'Oh pity, pity, pity, please,
As I did pity thee,
Or fling me from your castle's walls
And break my slim body.'
'But how can I have pity
When you are just a whore?
Now get you back to England
Where I'll see you no more!'
'Oh false and faithless knight,' said she,
'I'll to my father's door,
And he will prove to Scotland
That I have never been whore.'
Her mother, who was truly queen,
She gently then did smile:
'You're not the first, nor only one,
The Scotsmen did beguile.'
Come all ye maidens, young and old,
Pray come, be warned of me -
Scots were never, never true.
And Scots will never be.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
|
|
The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
John Tyler
Tyler reportedly recognized the "coming importance of the Asian Pacific region to trade"], and sent a diplomatic mission to China, which successfully established consular and commercial relations between China and the United States, allowing the United States to gain the same trading concessions from China that Britain had.[10] Tyler also applied the Monroe Doctrine to Hawaii, told Britain not to interfere there, and began the process of annexing Hawaii to the United States.[In 1842 the Secretary of State, Daniel Webster, negotiated the Webster-Ashburton Treaty with Britain which concluded where the border between Maine and Canada lay.[10] The issue of where the border lay had caused tension between the United States and Britain for a notable amount of time, and had brought the two countries narrowly to war with each other on several occasions.[ The treaty improved Anglo-American diplomatic relations.However, Tyler was unsuccessful in concluding a treaty with the British to fix the boundaries of Oregon.[Tyler brought the Second Seminole War to an end in 1842, and he also advocated the establishment of a chain of American forts from Council Bluffs, Iowa, to the Pacific.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
|
|
The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
John Tyler
10th president of the United States
Birth March 29, 1790
Death January 18, 1862
Home State Virginia
Party Whig
Term In Office 1841-1845
Vice President None
Significant Acts Established the boundary between Maine and Canada in 1842 with the Webster-Ashburton Treaty with Great Britain.
Opened Asia to U.S. trade for the first time through the Treaty of Wanghia with China in 1844.
Annexed Texas in 1845.
Career 1817-1821 Represented Virginia in the U.S. House of Representatives.
1825-1827 Served as governor of Virginia.
1827-1836 Represented Virginia in the U.S. Senate.
March 4-April 4, 1841 Vice president of the United States under William Henry Harrison.
1841-1845 President of the United States.
1861 Elected to the Confederate States Congress, but died before taking office.
Did You Know In 1843 Tyler withstood an impeachment effort by his own party.
Tyler enrolled in the College of William and Mary at the age of 15 and graduated at 17.
Tyler fathered 14 children, more than any other president.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
|
|
The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
SHANIA TWAIN
Man! I Feel Like A Woman!
I'm going out tonight-I'm feelin' alright
Gonna let it all hang out
Wanna make some noise-really raise my voice
Yeah, I wanna scream and shout
No inhibitions-make no conditions
Get a little outta line
I ain't gonna act politically correct
I only wanna have a good time
The best thing about being a woman
Is the prerogative to have a little fun (fun, fun)
Oh, oh, oh, go totally crazy-forget I'm a lady
Men's shirts-short skirts
Oh, oh, oh, really go wild-yeah, doin' it in style
Oh, oh, oh, get in the action-feel the attraction
Color my hair-do what I dare
Oh, oh, oh, I wanna be free-yeah, to feel the way I feel
Man! I feel like a woman!
The girls need a break-tonight we're gonna take
The chance to get out on the town
We don't need romance-we only wanna dance
We're gonna let our hair hang down
The best thing about being a woman
Is the prerogative to have a little fun (fun, fun)
Oh, oh, oh, go totally crazy-forget I'm a lady
Men's shirts-short skirts
Oh, oh, oh, really go wild-yeah, doin' it in style
Oh, oh, oh, get in the action-feel the attraction
Color my hair-do what I dare
Oh, oh, oh, I wanna be free-yeah, to feel the way I feel
Man! I feel like a woman!
The best thing about being a woman
Is the prerogative to have a little fun (fun, fun)
Oh, oh, oh, go totally crazy-forget I'm a lady
Men's shirts-short skirts
Oh, oh, oh, really go wild-yeah, doin' it in style
Oh, oh, oh, get in the action-feel the attraction
Color my hair-do what I dare
Oh, oh, oh, I wanna be free-yeah, to feel the way I feel
Man! I feel like a woman!
I get totally crazy
Can you feel it
Come, come, come on baby
I feel like a woman
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 53,734 Likes: 2
Educator to comprehension impaired (JLA, that is you) 50000+ posts
|
|
Educator to comprehension impaired (JLA, that is you) 50000+ posts
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 53,734 Likes: 2 |
Google 4 seconds ago Reading a post
Forum: off topic and offensive posts
Thread: Ask A Scientist!
Google 17 minutes 36 seconds ago Reading a post
Forum: off topic and offensive posts
Thread: Ask A Scientist!
Google 36 minutes 27 seconds ago Reading a post
Forum: off topic and offensive posts
Thread: Ask A Scientist!
Google 51 minutes 27 seconds ago Reading a post
Forum: off topic and offensive posts
Thread: Ask A Scientist!
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
|
|
The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
|
|
The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
Do mass murderers kill only in church?
Do people in Australia call the rest of the world 'up over'?
Do pilots take crash-courses?
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
|
|
The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
99) Secure that ladder then drain your bladder
100) Protect your screw to catch that glue
101) Package your meat for a real neat treat
102) Holster your gun then shootings more fun
103) Canvas that trailer before you nail her
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
|
|
The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
104) Garage the tractor then attack her
105) Net that grass hopper before you pop her
106) Sock that wanger before you bang her
107) Pen that rooster, she'll be much looser
108) Trim your hardwood then do her real good
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
|
|
The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
109) Garnish your oak then give her a poke
110) Pouch your associate then go fornicate
111) Smother your affiliate before you ejaculate
112) Confine your fascinate before it regurgitates
113) Catch that goat before it bloats
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
|
|
The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
How do Jewish wives get their children ready for supper? They put them in the car.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
|
|
The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
|
|
|
|
|
