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Timelord. Drunkard. 15000+ posts
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Timelord. Drunkard. 15000+ posts
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Bibbo (77%, 27 Votes)
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Darth (23%, 8 Votes)
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Dave (63%, 22 Votes)
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Zod (37%, 13 Votes)
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Chris Oakley (31%, 11 Votes)
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Captain Sammitch (69%, 24 Votes)
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Velo (29%, 10 Votes)
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Grimm (37%, 13 Votes)
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Doc. Mid-Nite (3%, 1 Votes)
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Notwedge (31%, 11 Votes)
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Joe Mama (40%, 14 Votes)
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King Snarf (11%, 4 Votes)
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Nowhereman (Current Champ) (49%, 17 Votes)
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whomod said: I generally don't like it when people decide to play by the rules against people who don't play by the rules. It tends to put you immediately at a disadvantage and IMO is a sign of true weakness. This is true both in politics and on the internet." Our Friendly Neighborhood Ray-man said: "no, the doctor's right. besides, he has seniority."
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I will have sex with whoever wins the four way elimination match!
I was never a real man,and always loved the cock,so I finally decided to become a woman.
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Joined: May 2003
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Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
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Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 28,009 |
Why couldn't you have posted this BEFORE I voted?!?
Uschi said:I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry. MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost! "I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock ![[Linked Image from i6.photobucket.com]](http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y203/JoeMama13/RedSoxBanner05.png)
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Joined: Jul 2002
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Brutha few posts
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Brutha few posts
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I've slept with Joe Mama!
I'm so fucking old!
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 28,009
Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
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Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 28,009 |
Quote:
Hasbeen Hulk Hogan said:
I've slept with Joe Mama!
No...you slept with YO mama. You over-rated half-talent.
Gee...wonder whose alt id THIS is  ...hmmmmm...Y'cunt. 
Uschi said:I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry. MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost! "I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 285
Smeg head! 200+ posts
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Smeg head! 200+ posts
Joined: Oct 2000
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If you're in trouble, he will save the day
He's brave and he's fearless, come what may
Without him, the mission would go astray
He's Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer
Without him, life would be much grimmer
He's handsome, trim, and no one's slimmer
He will never need a Zimmer
He's Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer
More reliable than a garden Strimmer
He's never been mistaken for Yul Brynner.
He's not bald and his head doesn't glimmer
Master of the wit and the repartee
His command of space directives is uncanny
How come he's such a genius? Don't ask me
Ask Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 28,009
Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
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Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 28,009 |
Uschi said:I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry. MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost! "I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock
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Joined: Sep 2003
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5000+ posts
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5000+ posts
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*The instrumental to We Will Rock You is heard over the speakers as PenWing walks to the ring.*
I've come out here tonight to...apologize. I'm sorry. I said I would put Oakers in a coma at Meek Mok Day. I thought I did. The guy looked dead at the end of out match. I mean, 10 hockey sticks cracked over his head, you'd think that would do the trick. But somehow, someway, by some twist of fate, Oakers not only woke up after our Old Time Hockey Fight, he managed to get his ass over here to participate in a match later with Captain Sammitch. Why he wants to get his ass handed to him so soon after his last defeat? I have no idea. But that's not the worst of it.
He wants a rematch.
For that, I am truly sorry.
Does he deserve a rematch? After the way his ass was handed to him, no.
But, he has issued a challenge to me, and so I must accept the invitation to kick his ass, yet again.
In an Aerial Assault Cage Match.
The only way win this match is to make the pin after an aerial move.
So, Oakers, if you're game, so am I. To be fair, since you'll probably need a little time to recover from your ass beating tonight, I'll let you name the date.
And this time, when I land the High Holy Howe, you won't want to even think about wasting my time on you again.
*PenWing drops the mike and walks out to his music.*
<sub>Will Eisner's last work - The Plot: The Secret Story of the Protocols of the Elders of ZionRDCW Profile"Well, as it happens, I wrote the damned SOP," Illescue half snarled, "and as of now, you can bar those jackals from any part of this facility until Hell's a hockey rink! Is that perfectly clear?!" - Dr. Franz Illescue - Honor Harrington: At All Costs"I don't know what I'm do, or how I do, I just do." - Alexander Ovechkin</sub>
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100+ posts
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SO WHEN'S THE MENAGETROI BETWEEN MYSELF, JOE, AND MY YOUNGER SELF WITH MY YOUNGER CROSS DRESSING SELF BEING THIS TIME LINES CHRIS OAKLEY'S FUTURE SELF ACTING AS THE SPECIAL GUEST REFEREE?
I'm Chris Oakley from 40 years in the future!
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 28,009
Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
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Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 28,009 |
Every night in Woburn. Hot lovin' for you all!
Uschi said:I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry. MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost! "I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 12,353
Award-Winning Author 10000+ posts
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Award-Winning Author 10000+ posts
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 12,353 |
Green Day's "Espionage" hits as King Snarf makes his way to the ring!Ladies & gentlemen, children of all ages, welcome to that amazing spectacle that we like to call Tuesday Night Havoc! Tonight is a very special night for yours truly. Why? Well, first off, I have a shot at the Intercuntinental title tonight! And not only that, but it's a ladder match to boot. Now, I can already hear you folks at home saying, "Sweet sassy molassy! This is gonna be one humdinger of a show!" But wait, there's more! This is not just any ladder match, no no! This is a TRIPLE THREAT LADDER MATCH!! That's right! King Snarf finally gets to lay the beatdown on those two perpetual thorns in the backside, Nowhereman & Joe Mama! I'm sure all you fans are now saying, "King Snarf! That's much too much show for the meager price that we paid! Should we go to the RDCW ticket counter and offer more money for what could possibly one of the most incredible donnybrooks we'll see in our lifetime?" Hell no! Fear not, loyal fans, for tonight King Snarf will kick two asses for the price of one! That's right, I'm serving up knuckle sammitches for wholesale price and passing the savings onto you! And, as an added bonus, at no additional charge, tonight also marks the start of- drumroll pleas- The Triple Set Auditions!! That's right! One lucky RDCW superstar has the opportunity to strut his stuff and become the newest member in what is arguably the greatest faction in sports-entertainmemt history! And that's all happening tonight! Auditions! Ladders! Titles! High spots, carnage and mayhem! King Snarf has spoken! 
Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!
All hail King Snarf!
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 28,009
Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
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Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 28,009 |
Rage Against The Machine's "Township Rebellion" plays. Out comes Joe Mama, walking to the ring with purpose. As he enters the ring he makes a "cut" gesture. The music stops.
JM: I'm here, King Snarf, because, at last week's Hangover, I told these fans that I had an announcement for you. And, unlike you, I keep my promises to the fans. So let me just cut to the chase. Months ago, you stood in this ring and cut into my mic time. You issued a challenge, which I accepted. Then you did everything in your power to avoid facing me in any kind of match. You hid behind the Doctor. You hid behind the Triple Set. You hid and dodged and got booked in all sorts of matches to avoid facing me. You even had an run for a title that YOU KNOW you didn't deserve.
Meanwhile, I competed in any and every match I could. I faced your pals in the Triple Set. I wrestled LLance. I was in tag matches and singles matches, all with an eye towards finishing what you started. I lost focus of the Hardcore Porno belt. I got soft, and that cost me my spot in the RwO.
At the mention of the RwO, the crowd starts booing.
JM: Yeah...go ahead and boo. They deserve it, just like I deserved to get the boot. The fact is, I was a future hardcore legend and I let my potential slip away because of a stupid non-feud with someone who had neither the guts nor the integrity to face me. I realize, Snarf, that you are NEVER gonna step up and give me a one-on-one match. You fear me, and rightly so. So, in the interest of wanting a fresh start, and to regain my focus, this is my announcement.
I am done chasing you. You aren't worth my time or my effort. Tonight's match will be the first and only time I push to get in a ring with you.
The crowd is shocked
JM: Instead, I'm going to focus on winning the Inter-cunt-inental Title tonight. And I'm committing to helping Son of Mxy win championship gold, whether solo or with me as his tag team partner. I've got a few other plans, but none of them involve you, Snarf. I'm done chasing you around for a match that you obviously don't have the sack to wrestle. (Joe turns to the crowd) So really, the only thing left to say is "God help you on your match with me and Nowherefag tonight" and...
Joe spins and hits King Snarf in the left temple with what's obviously a loaded fist. Joe uses the East Coast Hammer on King Snarf, then continues to pound on King Snarf with the loaded right. Joe stands...
JM: "TAG! YOU'RE IT, SNARF!!!"
The crowd is cheering and booing. Joe Mama opens his right fist to reveal...
JM: Oh, and just in case you're thinking of cutting your losses and ignoring me again, here's a little something for you. Consider it a wedding gift for you and Nowhereman...
It's a set of car keys on a keychain that has a valet ticket on it. The ticket clearly says "J13". The Cheese-O-Tron comes alive, showing a parking space marked "J13". In the spot is the same rust-colored El Camino that ran down King Snarf. Joe drops the keys on King Snarf's chest.
JM: That right, Snarf. I did it. How you didn't figure it out is beyond me. But now you know. See you at the match, bitch.
Joe Mama exits the ring and makes his way through the crowd, leaving King Snarf bloody on the mat.
Uschi said:I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry. MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost! "I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock
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Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 19,546 Likes: 1
living in 1962 15000+ posts
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living in 1962 15000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 19,546 Likes: 1 |
*breaking kayfabe*  Daaaaaaaaaaaammmnnnnn. . . Good job.
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300+ posts
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300+ posts
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Quote:
Christine Oakley said:
I will have sex with whoever wins the four way elimination match!
Would you get out of the broadcast booth and quit giving Mike Monroe lap dances! I don't care how many twenties he waves at you, we're trying to do a show here!
The Madman says: "that's fucked up. that ain't right."
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Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 19,546 Likes: 1
living in 1962 15000+ posts
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living in 1962 15000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 19,546 Likes: 1 |
Quote:
Hasbeen Hulk Hogan said:
I've slept with Joe Mama!
True story, btw, Hogan got so pissed at us flipping him off at a Nitro, he leaned over and said, "Brother, that's the same finger I used on your mother last night!"
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Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 5,813
I Am Groot 5000+ posts
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I Am Groot 5000+ posts
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 5,813 |
*Camera fades to backstage area.We see PenWing striding through the curtain on his way back to his dressing room.He abruptly stops in his tracks as the camera pans over to Chris Oakley coming the other way down the hall,heading to the ring for his match against Captain Sammitch.Chris is wearing a UMass Minutemen hockey shirt and toting a mike in one hand;he walks right up to PenWing and gives him a glare that could melt solid steel.As the crowd watches the staredown unfold on the Cheese-o-Tron,Chris starts to speak.*
Finished,PenWing?We haven't even gotten started yet!
(huge pops from crowd)
Before I go to the ring and kick the living hell out of Captain Sammitch,let me just answer what you said about our rematch.You said you wanted me to name the time and the place for our next showdown...well,I've got the perfect time and place--right here at the Cheesedome on next week's "Tuesday Night Havoc"!
(more huge pops from crowd)
See you then,loser...if you don't chicken out,that is.
*Chris puts his mike down and PenWing starts to walk away.PenWing only gets two steps,however,before Chris grabs him by the arm,spins him around,and kicks him in the gut.As PenWing struggles to shake off this blow,Chris hoists him up in the air and slams him onto the concrete arena floor with an F-5.Promoters,other RDCW stars,and EMTs start rushing down the corridor as Chris continues on his way to the ring for his bout with Captain Sammitch.*
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 12,353
Award-Winning Author 10000+ posts
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Award-Winning Author 10000+ posts
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 12,353 |
Backstage, a bleeding and furious King Snarf is on a tear. He's knocking over equipmet, yelling, until he sees his destination- Nowhereman's office. He kicks open the door and slams his fists down upon the desk.
KS: What. do. you. KNOW??
NM: What are you nattering on about?
KS: When Joe ran me down, he was a full-fledged member of the RwO. Now, why oh why can't I help but think that YOU had a hand in that?
NM: Look, I bloody well hate you, but I'm not one for hit and runs.
*King Snarf still looks angry, but then he suddenly breaks into a broad smile.*
NM: What?
KS: You know you're screwed either way, right?
NM: What do you mean?
KS: Well, if you're lying to me, I'll kill you. And if you're telling the truth, then one might wonder if you're the next to kiss a fender.
NM: I still don't see what you're getting at.
KS: Well, Joe Mama got so worked up over me that he tried to run me down with a car, and in the process, nearly took out TK-069 to boot. And all I did was not have a match with him. You, on the other hand, betrayed him, humiliated him, and had you cronies beat the crap out of him. God knows what he'll do to you. *Nowhereman suddenly goes pale and does the Vince McMahon gulp of fear* And on that happy note, I'll see you in the ring! *King Snarf smiles, gives Nowhereman a pat on the shoulder, and leaves the co-GM looking somewhat pale and anxious.*
Madman Marcum: Good Lord! Our beloved co-General Manager is going to have to defend his title against two raving psychotics! It's not fair.
Mike "The Mouth" Monroe: My God! King Snarf promised mayhem tonight, and we're damn sure seeing it!
Madman Marcum
Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!
All hail King Snarf!
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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 5,142
5000+ posts
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5000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 5,142 |
Quote:
Christine Oakley said:
I will have sex with whoever wins the four way elimination match!
Suddenly I'm glad for the lack of popularity I have in this forum.
I pulled my calf when sleeping last night, so I'm ready to forfeit my match. I gotta think about my future, man!
And that's terrible.
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Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 24,593
Timelord. Drunkard. 15000+ posts
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Timelord. Drunkard. 15000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 24,593 |
Quote:
Christine Oakley said:
I will have sex with whoever wins the four way elimination match!
As another incentive to the men involved in the elimination match, Christine Oakley will have sex with the losers.
whomod said: I generally don't like it when people decide to play by the rules against people who don't play by the rules. It tends to put you immediately at a disadvantage and IMO is a sign of true weakness. This is true both in politics and on the internet." Our Friendly Neighborhood Ray-man said: "no, the doctor's right. besides, he has seniority."
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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 5,142
5000+ posts
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5000+ posts
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Posts: 5,142 |
And that's terrible.
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 285
Smeg head! 200+ posts
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Smeg head! 200+ posts
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 285 |
Quote:
King Snarf said:
Backstage, a bleeding and furious King Snarf is on a tear. He's knocking over equipmet, yelling, until he sees his destination- Nowhereman's office. He kicks open the door and slams his fists down upon the desk.
KS: What. do. you. KNOW??
NM: What are you nattering on about?
KS: When Joe ran me down, he was a full-fledged member of the RwO. Now, why oh why can't I help but think that YOU had a hand in that?
NM: Look, I bloody well hate you, but I'm not one for hit and runs.
*King Snarf still looks angry, but then he suddenly breaks into a broad smile.*
NM: What?
KS: You know you're screwed either way, right?
NM: What do you mean?
KS: Well, if you're lying to me, I'll kill you. And if you're telling the truth, then one might wonder if you're the next to kiss a fender.
NM: I still don't see what you're getting at.
KS: Well, Joe Mama got so worked up over me that he tried to run me down with a car, and in the process, nearly took out TK-069 to boot. And all I did was not have a match with him. You, on the other hand, betrayed him, humiliated him, and had you cronies beat the crap out of him. God knows what he'll do to you. *Nowhereman suddenly goes pale and does the Vince McMahon gulp of fear* And on that happy note, I'll see you in the ring! *King Snarf smiles, gives Nowhereman a pat on the shoulder, and leaves the co-GM looking somewhat pale and anxious.*
Madman Marcum: Good Lord! Our beloved co-General Manager is going to have to defend his title against two raving psychotics! It's not fair.
Mike "The Mouth" Monroe: My God! King Snarf promised mayhem tonight, and we're damn sure seeing it!
Madman Marcum
Something tells me Captain Howdy will be defending that belt!
If you're in trouble, he will save the day
He's brave and he's fearless, come what may
Without him, the mission would go astray
He's Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer
Without him, life would be much grimmer
He's handsome, trim, and no one's slimmer
He will never need a Zimmer
He's Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer
More reliable than a garden Strimmer
He's never been mistaken for Yul Brynner.
He's not bald and his head doesn't glimmer
Master of the wit and the repartee
His command of space directives is uncanny
How come he's such a genius? Don't ask me
Ask Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer
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DROP TOEHOLD 25+ posts
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DROP TOEHOLD 25+ posts
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Posts: 67 |
What a slobberknocker!
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Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 2,900
notnotnotnotnotnotnotwedge 2500+ posts
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notnotnotnotnotnotnotwedge 2500+ posts
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 2,900 |
*Dope nose plays as NW heads down to the ring.*
NW: I'm very sorry to have to announce this, but in the interest of not having sex with Christine Oakley I will not be taking part in the eurotrash elimination match tonight.
*The Doctor steps out onto the stage with a mic in hand.*
Doctor: you mean to tell me that after everything that I arranged and everything you went through in the gauntlet match, not to mention all that talk about Southern Ireland you aren't going through with the match.
NW: Well, it turns out that I'm not really from Southern Ireland, I'm from South Bend, Indiana; home of college football's Fighting Irish. Not to mention that bitch is scary beyond all reason.
Doctor: sorry, like it or not you're in that match tonight and I expect you to do your best.
NW: Fine, but I'm not letting her anywhere near me. As hadr as it is to believe, I'm pretty sure she's crazier than I am.
Doctor: Whatever, just make sure you're ready.
*The doctor leaves.*
NW: OK, and as much as I hate to diappoint twice in one night, I'm sorry to say I will not be able to resume my membership in the Triple Set as I have an appointment at the dog barber for one of my pets. Sorry. I'll see you later at my match though. Thanks.
*Dope Nose plays and NotWedge leavs the ring area.*
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Joined: Apr 2004
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DROP TOEHOLD 25+ posts
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DROP TOEHOLD 25+ posts
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 67 |
What a slobberknocker!
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 12,353
Award-Winning Author 10000+ posts
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Award-Winning Author 10000+ posts
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 12,353 |
Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!
All hail King Snarf!
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