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Who will I break next? 15000+ posts
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Who will I break next? 15000+ posts
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Any ass holes ready to admit anything?
November 6th, 2012: Americas new Independence Day.
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faggot 15000+ posts
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faggot 15000+ posts
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Er... I never called anyone back?
Old men, fear me! You will shatter under my ruthless apathetic assault!
Uschi - 2
Old Men - 0
"I am convinced that this world is of no importance, and that the only people who care about dates are imbeciles and Spanish teachers." -- Jean Arp, 1921
"If Jesus came back and saw what people are doing in his name, he would never never stop throwing up." - Max von Sydow, "Hannah and Her Sisters"
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Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
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Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
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Sure, I'll start.
The summer of my sophmore year in high school, I was dating this great-looking, smart, funny girl who loved me unconditionally. One day, she was at my house and we were foolin' around (making out, touching, and a little dry-humping), when I got a call from a buddy with a spare Red Sox ticket. This girl - did I mention "understanding"? No? -practically DEMANDED that I take the ticket, so I did.
I ended up going to the game with my buddy and his friends from his movie theater job. Great group of people. There was one chick, though, who was SMOKIN' hot! Blonde hair, blue eyes, flirty as hell, and (apparently) into your's truly. We chatted, flirted, and generally got along well. Then, during our post-game Chinese food run, I found out that, not only was she interested in me...she was moving outta town in two weeks.
So I cheated on my girlfriend. I haven't gotten to the worst part yet.
After the cheating (my first time doing so), I felt so guilty that I told my best friend in hopes that he would give me advice on what to do or sell me out to his girlfriend (who was tight with mine). He did neither. The guilt just grew and grew. Finally, it got to be so bad that I called her up outta the blue and broke up with her. Didn't tell her the true reason why, thus giving her the option of dumping my careless ass to the curb (which would've been the first noble thing I'd done since the game). Just gave her a half-assed "I'm just not happy" and, when he started weeping (not sobbing, not bawling, but weeping over the loss of the guy she loved), I muttered something about "I gotta go" and hung up. I've seen her since and we've chatted - she eventually found out but that pain is long gone for her - but the thing that kills me is that I should've told her the truth and done right by her there. I don't even remember the name of the girl I cheated on her with, but I can tell you intimate details about things my girlfriend said to me, gifts she gave me, and some really great times we had.
Sometimes I wonder what would've happened if I hadn't cheated on her. I'm sure we wouldn't have been high school sweethearts that got married. But I do know that the guilt from what I did still carries over today - I'd never be reckless with someone's love.
Just thinking about it makes me feel like an asshole.
Uschi said:I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry. MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost! "I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock ![[Linked Image from i6.photobucket.com]](http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y203/JoeMama13/RedSoxBanner05.png)
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cheating...then lying to cover it up. That's the worst.
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Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
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Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
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Posts: 28,009 |
Um...yeah...I think that's the point of my story.
Uschi said:I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry. MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost! "I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock
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What is funny...is I clicked the wrong threat. I read your story after I posted. MY fault there. Sorry.
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Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
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Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
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Don't be sorry. It's not like your comment isn't relevant (it is). We'll just chalk it up to a small comedy of errors and live happily ever after. That is, if my current girlfriend will let us.
Uschi said:I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry. MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost! "I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock
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Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
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Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
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Uschi said:I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry. MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost! "I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock
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Living the dream 15000+ posts
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Living the dream 15000+ posts
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One girl I didn't call during Christmas time.
Another girl I broke up with cause she wanted marriage and I, at the time, didn't. I wanted to enjoy the single life and party and stuff. Part of me thought I couldn't do that with her around. Flash forward four years later, I realized what I screwed up after having been cheated on, lied to, and deceived by another chick. Lesson being: What goes around does indeed come around. Except I never cheated on anyone.
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betrayal and collapse 5000+ posts
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betrayal and collapse 5000+ posts
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Damn, y'all some messed up folks!
...you tell stories, we tell lies.
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Hrm....I've never been like totally cruel to the people I dated but I did not call a few guys when I said I would and broke up with them just because...but we had never dated for more than a few weeks so it wasnt serious.
BUT I do have a fabuloso story about my sis' love life. She's really pretty for those of you that don't know and anyways her high school life was reather bush. She fell for what she called "The baptist boy" and got her first kiss from him and they started dating. It wasn't till then the blond hair, blue-eyed and very good looking Mormon Drummer started taking a sudden interest. So she kept going out with Chris (Baptist guy) just in case it didnt go right with Jeff (drummer dude). Well enter Andrew, nice, sweet, charming "young man" as my dad called him who played sax (these were all band guys-she was in CG) and he and my sister start spending a lot of time "watching the stars" together.
WELL all this came to a head when after halftime on a Friday night, Ang goes behind the stands with Jeff and starts making out with him...in walks Chris and is likE< "ANGELA, what are you doing?" To which my sis replies, "kissing a better guy than you?" Heartbroken and with tears flowing freely Chris turned and left.
Really interesting....Ang went star watching with Andrew after that show which he incidentally lived next door to Jeff. And what does she see??? Jeff making out with another girl. So my sis called the cops and called it a "violent domestic disturbance" and stayed to watch the cops show up and must Jeff in the middle of him getting in on with some unnamed girl.
Course Andrew still to this day has no idea she ever got serious with two other boys the same time she was dating him but their 5 year reunion is this may :P
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Your death will make me king! 15000+ posts
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Your death will make me king! 15000+ posts
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Officially "too old for this shit" 15000+ posts
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Officially "too old for this shit" 15000+ posts
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Married her. 
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One of my girlfriends came back from the bathroom in time to see me snorting a gramme of speed off the glass top of her bedside table.
I thought that I'd better explain what I was doing and so, in addition to frightening and upsetting her, I also corrupted her by offering an insight into a world that she'd have been better off knowing nothing about.
I still feel bad about it.
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She should have participated.
I made a sex tape with my ex once. After we broke up she wanted it and I told her I couldnt find it.
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Who will I break next? 15000+ posts
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Who will I break next? 15000+ posts
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Quote:
Fused said:
She should have participated.
I made a sex tape with my ex once. After we broke up she wanted it and I told her I couldnt find it.
November 6th, 2012: Americas new Independence Day.
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Your death will make me king! 15000+ posts
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Your death will make me king! 15000+ posts
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The Swizzler.... 6000+ posts
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Wait I have a story.....my sister reminded me over dinner! There was this guy once again smitten with my sister before the whole triangle thing. Brett brought his shiny new, red car by the house. I went out to see him and my sis told me, "I REALLY do NOT wanna talk to him." Then after I was talkin to Brett for a bit and she still didn't come out, I went around to get her. Then she starts the shower....I was so mad that I went back outside and told Brett, "My sister is just pretending to be in the shower because she really does not want to talk to you right now." Yeah I was cruel.....but my sister rushed outside after that to see the car :P
Doesnt really have anything to do with the dating thing but he wanted to date my sister so maybe that counted :P
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1. You do not talk about snarf. 7500+ posts
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1. You do not talk about snarf. 7500+ posts
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I never see the same hooker twice, no matter how good I was!
Me No Rikey Rob, he's a banana queer!
I shit on Hogan!
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Posts: 10,081
... 10000+ posts
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I once dated a girl I wasn't interested in for two whole months just because I'd never dated before. She was four years older than I was (mistake one), getting ready to graduate college while I was still a freshman (mistake two), and probably still likes me. She hung around town for almost a full school year after she graduated in hopes of getting back together with me - which she never did. And, I didn't even dump her over the phone... I did it via e-mail.
Yeah... I'm low.
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betrayal and collapse 5000+ posts
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betrayal and collapse 5000+ posts
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Posts: 5,203 |
Quote:
ROY BATTY said:
I never see the same hooker twice, no matter how good I was!
She's missin' out...
...you tell stories, we tell lies.
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Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 34,398 Likes: 38
"Hey this is PCG342's bro..." 15000+ posts
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"Hey this is PCG342's bro..." 15000+ posts
Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 34,398 Likes: 38 |
Quote:
ROY BATTY said:
I never see the same hooker twice, no matter how good I was!
You have me curious...why not?
"Are you eating it...or is it eating you?" [center] ![[Linked Image from i13.photobucket.com]](http://i13.photobucket.com/albums/a275/captainsammitch/boards/banners/blogban3.jpg) [/center] [center] ![[Linked Image from i13.photobucket.com]](http://i13.photobucket.com/albums/a275/captainsammitch/boards/banners/jlamiska.jpg) [/center]
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1. You do not talk about snarf. 7500+ posts
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1. You do not talk about snarf. 7500+ posts
Joined: Oct 2000
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Quote:
theory9 said:
Quote:
ROY BATTY said:
I never see the same hooker twice, no matter how good I was!
She's missin' out...
CORRECTION!
They're missing out!
Me No Rikey Rob, he's a banana queer!
I shit on Hogan!
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Joined: Oct 2000
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1. You do not talk about snarf. 7500+ posts
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1. You do not talk about snarf. 7500+ posts
Joined: Oct 2000
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Quote:
MisterJLA said:
Quote:
ROY BATTY said:
I never see the same hooker twice, no matter how good I was!
You have me curious...why not?
...just spreading my love!
Me No Rikey Rob, he's a banana queer!
I shit on Hogan!
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Posts: 34,398 Likes: 38
"Hey this is PCG342's bro..." 15000+ posts
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"Hey this is PCG342's bro..." 15000+ posts
Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 34,398 Likes: 38 |
"Are you eating it...or is it eating you?" [center] [/center] [center] [/center]
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Joined: Oct 2000
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1. You do not talk about snarf. 7500+ posts
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1. You do not talk about snarf. 7500+ posts
Joined: Oct 2000
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Me No Rikey Rob, he's a banana queer!
I shit on Hogan!
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HULK ONCE HULK OUT ON WOMAN WHILE HAVING SEX! HULK HAD TO BURY BODY IN DESERT!
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Joined: Oct 2000
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betrayal and collapse 5000+ posts
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betrayal and collapse 5000+ posts
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,203 |
Quote:
the hulk said:
HULK ONCE HULK OUT ON WOMAN WHILE HAVING SEX! HULK HAD TO BURY BODY IN DESERT!
Uh, were you havin' sex in the desert?
...you tell stories, we tell lies.
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Award-Winning Author 10000+ posts
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Award-Winning Author 10000+ posts
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So, why didn't rex ever answer his own question? I assume his answer would involve fabric softener at some point....
Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!
All hail King Snarf!
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Hip To Be Square 15000+ posts
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Hip To Be Square 15000+ posts
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master of the red x 3000+ posts
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master of the red x 3000+ posts
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I dated a girl for about a year from France. She was kind of a bitch and had reached a point where she jumped down my throat about little things.
About the same time, a former girlfriend of mine from Iowa had moved from Iowa to about an hour from where I lived, and had been inviting me up for a weekend. While she still turned me on, I was just going to visit her and hang out with her as friends, just to start things slow. I'd planned a weekend to go up, and told my French girlfriend I was visiting an old friend (without telling her it was an old girlfriend). And really, as planned, nothing was going to happen.
But a few days before my weekend trip, my girlfriend was giving me shit on a double-date in a nightclub, and it especially pissed me off that she was giving me shit in front of the two others with us, and I told her "That's it, we're not dating anymore, we're just friends from this point on." And I went off on my weekend, still with no plans for anything but some pleasant conversation and a dinner or two with the Iowa girl.
When I was up there, after dinner and a few drinks, we went back to her apartment and I fell asleep. When I woke up, she was curled up against me, looking beautiful, and wearing a lot less clothes. I always wake up with a raging hard-on. We had we pounding sex for the remainder of the two days.
At one point the phone rang, shortly after we started going at it (about 10 PM) and she picked up the phone! I initially stopped, but after a few minutes, I got tired of waiting, and slipped my cock back inside her and started pumping away. She couldn't object without letting the person on the phone hear, so there was no resistance. Somehow the situation really got me going, and I pulled out and shot a load that went past her head, with a loud shout of unrestrained passion. No doubt the person on the phone could hear it.
"Oh, that was just the TV I have on", said my girl, a rather skilled liar.
She finished the conversation, and turned to me with a mixture of playfulness and frustration: "THAT WAS MY MOTHER!!"
We both laughed about it, and proceeded to have at it for several more hours.
I finally kissed her goodbye, and drove home.
When I got home and showered, my French ex called me up and asked me to come over. I visited her, and surprisingly, she apologized and made up with me. Equally surprisingly, she then proceeded to fuck me with considerable passion. Who was I to argue? I knew she was going back to France in about 2 months, so I stayed together with her until she left, to end it on a good note.
I spoke a few more times with my Iowa girl, but didn't see her again while I was with the French girl, and for quite a while after.
It was a Ross and Rachel situation ("we were on a break!!" ) so technically, I never cheated on her. Sometimes I feel just a little bit guilty about it, but mostly, I just let a satisfied grin cross my face, as I remember one of the most action-filled weekends of my life.
Good times...
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Even the body of Man can be commanded into health. 200+ posts
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Even the body of Man can be commanded into health. 200+ posts
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Posts: 207 |
Cheating, twice, but she never found out. Still felt bad and guilty about it though.
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Joined: Jun 2004
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Who will I break next? 15000+ posts
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Who will I break next? 15000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 46,308 |
I dated a girl for about a year from France. She was kind of a bitch and had reached a point where she jumped down my throat about little things.
About the same time, a former girlfriend of mine from Iowa had moved from Iowa to about an hour from where I lived, and had been inviting me up for a weekend. While she still turned me on, I was just going to visit her and hang out with her as friends, just to start things slow. I'd planned a weekend to go up, and told my French girlfriend I was visiting an old friend (without telling her it was an old girlfriend). And really, as planned, nothing was going to happen.
But a few days before my weekend trip, my girlfriend was giving me shit on a double-date in a nightclub, and it especially pissed me off that she was giving me shit in front of the two others with us, and I told her "That's it, we're not dating anymore, we're just friends from this point on." And I went off on my weekend, still with no plans for anything but some pleasant conversation and a dinner or two with the Iowa girl.
When I was up there, after dinner and a few drinks, I fell asleep. When I woke up, she was curled up against me, looking beautiful, and wearing a lot less clothes. I always wake up with a raging hard-on. We had we pounding sex for the remainder of the two days.
At one point the phone rang, shortly after we started going at it (about 10 PM) and she picked up the phone! I initially stopped, but after a few minutes, I got tired of waiting, and slipped my cock back inside her and started pumping away. I reached orgasm, and did so rather loudly while she was still on the phone. She couldn't object without letting the person on the phone hear, so there was no resistance. Somehow the situation really got me going, and I pulled out and shot a load that went past her head, with a loud shout unrestrained passion. No doubt the person on the phone could hear it.
"Oh, that was just the TV I have on", said my girl, a rather skilled liar.
She finished the conversation, and turned to me with a mixture of playfulness and frustration: "THAT WAS MY MOTHER!!"
We both laughed about it, and proceeded to have at it for several more hours.
I finally kissed her goodbye, and drove home.
When I got home and showered, my French ex called me up and asked me to come over. I visited her, and surprisingly, she apologized and made up with me. Equally surprisingly, she then proceeded to fuck me with considerable passion. Who was I to argue? I knew she was going back to France in about 2 months, so I stayed together with her until she left, to end it on a good note.
I spoke a few more times with my Iowa girl, but didn't see her again while I was with the French girl, and for quite a while after.
It was a Ross and Rachel situation ("we were on a break!!" ) so technically, I never cheated on her. Sometimes I feel just a little bit guilty about it, but mostly, I just let a satisfied grin wash across my face, as I remember one of the most action-filled weekends of my life.
Good times...
Do you really expect any of us (other than snarf) are stupid enough to believe any of that?
November 6th, 2012: Americas new Independence Day.
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 28,009
Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
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Inglourious Basterd!!! 15000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 28,009 |
I dated a girl for about a year from France. She was kind of a bitch and had reached a point where she jumped down my throat about little things.
About the same time, a former girlfriend of mine from Iowa had moved from Iowa to about an hour from where I lived, and had been inviting me up for a weekend. While she still turned me on, I was just going to visit her and hang out with her as friends, just to start things slow. I'd planned a weekend to go up, and told my French girlfriend I was visiting an old friend (without telling her it was an old girlfriend). And really, as planned, nothing was going to happen.
But a few days before my weekend trip, my girlfriend was giving me shit on a double-date in a nightclub, and it especially pissed me off that she was giving me shit in front of the two others with us, and I told her "That's it, we're not dating anymore, we're just friends from this point on." And I went off on my weekend, still with no plans for anything but some pleasant conversation and a dinner or two with the Iowa girl.
When I was up there, after dinner and a few drinks, I fell asleep. When I woke up, she was curled up against me, looking beautiful, and wearing a lot less clothes. I always wake up with a raging hard-on. We had we pounding sex for the remainder of the two days.
At one point the phone rang, shortly after we started going at it (about 10 PM) and she picked up the phone! I initially stopped, but after a few minutes, I got tired of waiting, and slipped my cock back inside her and started pumping away. I reached orgasm, and did so rather loudly while she was still on the phone. She couldn't object without letting the person on the phone hear, so there was no resistance. Somehow the situation really got me going, and I pulled out and shot a load that went past her head, with a loud shout unrestrained passion. No doubt the person on the phone could hear it.
"Oh, that was just the TV I have on", said my girl, a rather skilled liar.
She finished the conversation, and turned to me with a mixture of playfulness and frustration: "THAT WAS MY MOTHER!!"
We both laughed about it, and proceeded to have at it for several more hours.
I finally kissed her goodbye, and drove home.
When I got home and showered, my French ex called me up and asked me to come over. I visited her, and surprisingly, she apologized and made up with me. Equally surprisingly, she then proceeded to fuck me with considerable passion. Who was I to argue? I knew she was going back to France in about 2 months, so I stayed together with her until she left, to end it on a good note.
I spoke a few more times with my Iowa girl, but didn't see her again while I was with the French girl, and for quite a while after.
It was a Ross and Rachel situation ("we were on a break!!" ) so technically, I never cheated on her. Sometimes I feel just a little bit guilty about it, but mostly, I just let a satisfied grin wash across my face, as I remember one of the most action-filled weekends of my life.
Good times...
Do you really expect any of us (other than snarf) are stupid enough to believe any of that? Just because it's lifted directly from Penthouse Forums doesn't mean that it's not true. It had to happen to SOMEONE, right?
Uschi said:I won't rape you, I'll just fuck you 'till it hurts and then not stop and you'll cry. MisterJLA: RACKS so hard, he called Jim Rome "Chris Everett." In Him, all porn is possible. He is far above mentions in so-called "blogs." RACK him, lest ye be lost! "I can't even brush my teeth without gagging!" - Tommy Tantillo: Wank & Cry, heckpuppy, and general laughingstock
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 46,308
Who will I break next? 15000+ posts
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Who will I break next? 15000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 46,308 |
They could all belong to some kind of KKK dating service.
November 6th, 2012: Americas new Independence Day.
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Posts: 53,734 Likes: 2
Educator to comprehension impaired (JLA, that is you) 50000+ posts
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Educator to comprehension impaired (JLA, that is you) 50000+ posts
Joined: Oct 2000
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Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 47,826 Likes: 8
Hip To Be Square 15000+ posts
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Hip To Be Square 15000+ posts
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 47,826 Likes: 8 |
down my throat
then proceeded to fuck me with considerable passion.
Good times...
Sounds more like a French man!
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Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 98
25+ posts
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25+ posts
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 98 |
cause that how i butter my rolls
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