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I just want a woman who isn't crazy...
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Quote:
harleykwin said:
Quote:
rex said:
Feel free to start a "whats wrong with men today" thread.
Ok. I'll start it here.
I'll just write what immediately comes to mind, but I am a bit distracted right now, as I am watching my beloved Yankees redeem themselves from last season's complete four game fuck up against the Sox   which led them to miss the Series. 
But I digress...
What's wrong with men today:
1. Married men who lie and claim that they are single. Don't think we are stupid and won't figure it out. We do and we are a vindictive bunch - hell hath no fury and all that jazz. We will call your wife to inform her of what a shit she is married to (which my best friend did after meeting this guy through the internet - all his wife had to do was log on and check his profile that he was "single and looking"). Seriously, if you want sex on the side go to craigslist or adultfriendfinder.com and you will find plenty of people looking for the same thing who will keep it on the DL, but don't get involved with someone who is looking for a relationship and fuck with their emotions and promise them love, commitment, etc. when you've already promised this to someone else and can't deliver.
1. b. Once you are busted for being a lying, cheating bastard, apologize and run like hell. The wrong response is, "I don't see how this changes our arraingement (sp?)," which was the response my above-mentioned friend got when she confronted the guy.
2. If you want to break up with someone, break up with her. Yes, she'll be mad and yell, but don't act like an asshole just to get her to dump you. Be a man and be upfront. It's going to suck, but what break up doesn't? And yes, despite what you may believe, we'd really rather you have the courage to tell us to our faces.
3. Don't tell us you want us to show/tell you what we like in bed, and then get annoyed when we do tell you. Guys talk about how they want us to be more open in the bedroom, but you don't. I don't know if its insecurity or what, but if you are going to ask me if I like it harder/softer/faster/slower/this position/whatever, don't get annoyed at me when I (gently) tell you how I like it. If you don't want to know, stop fucking asking.
4. Fighting and sex are mutually exclusive. If you have pissed us off, there is no way we want you touching us in any manner, let alone sexually.
5. If you are going to flirt with your ex or some random chick in a bar do not give us grief if we flirt with other men. Especially if you flirt in front of us.
6. Don't say you're going to call if you're not. Just say, "Had a nice time, nice meeting you." You don't ask for her number, she won't wonder why you didn't call.
7. Men bitch how women are superficial, but that goes both ways as mentioned before. It explains CZJ and Michael Douglass/Trump and his newest trophy/Anna Nicole and her one-foot-in-the-grave-now-deceased husband. Women want a tall guy, men want big tits; women want money, men want youth and beauty, etc. We can go round and round on the whole superficial aspect on this thread.
Actually, we could go in circles about the above, but really they are blanket statements: men cheat, women cheat; superficial; blah, blah blah, etc. Like I said in my earlier post, it cuts both ways.
I am now going back to my TV where the fabulous Yankees are winning. Yea! 
I like #3
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Quote:
Uschi said:
What's wrong with people in general:
They have a damn hard time getting the fuck over stupid little things and end up being dishonest and creating bad shit for everyone they know to get splattered with.
They aren't forgiving enough.
They are too damn selfish and self-absorbed to even let someone merge on the interstate, let alone have a healthy reciporcal relationship.
 Dear, sweet Harley Kwink...I'm madly in love with you. Marry me! We can go to Canadia. Or Boston or something. It'll be grand...You know the cookies are a given. They are ALWAYS a given. You could dump me tomorrow and you'd still get the cookies. Boston..shit, wherever dyke weddings were legalized. And where better to rub their little piggie noses in how bad they suck than right on their doorstep? What are they gonna do? Be jealous of you? Stare furiously at your tah-tahs? Not willingly give you cookies, but instead begrudgingly give you their cookies? Woman, time to wake up to the powers you wield - Uschi
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I, myself, can't wait for love robots... 
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yeah actually....in Men' Health they said more women cheat....and they are smart enough to get away with it.
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3. Don't tell us you want us to show/tell you what we like in bed, and then get annoyed when we do tell you. Guys talk about how they want us to be more open in the bedroom, but you don't. I don't know if its insecurity or what, but if you are going to ask me if I like it harder/softer/faster/slower/this position/whatever, don't get annoyed at me when I (gently) tell you how I like it. If you don't want to know, stop fucking asking.
I like #3
I knew there was a reason I liked you. 
Dear, sweet Harley Kwink...I'm madly in love with you. Marry me! We can go to Canadia. Or Boston or something. It'll be grand...You know the cookies are a given. They are ALWAYS a given. You could dump me tomorrow and you'd still get the cookies. Boston..shit, wherever dyke weddings were legalized. And where better to rub their little piggie noses in how bad they suck than right on their doorstep? What are they gonna do? Be jealous of you? Stare furiously at your tah-tahs? Not willingly give you cookies, but instead begrudgingly give you their cookies? Woman, time to wake up to the powers you wield - Uschi
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Yeah, they don't always get away with it..I'm too smart for my own good... 
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Quote:
harleykwin said:
3. Don't tell us you want us to show/tell you what we like in bed, and then get annoyed when we do tell you. Guys talk about how they want us to be more open in the bedroom, but you don't. I don't know if its insecurity or what, but if you are going to ask me if I like it harder/softer/faster/slower/this position/whatever, don't get annoyed at me when I (gently) tell you how I like it. If you don't want to know, stop fucking asking.
I like #3
I knew there was a reason I liked you.
If a man doesn't like #3 then they are insecure...
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Quote:
Pig Iron said:
I, myself, can't wait for love robots...
Y'know, there was a "Real Sex" episode on HBO that talked about custom made sex doll with real hair, glass eyes, and suction like orafices -- No joke, you could quite literally mold your perfect woman choosing hair color/length; breast size, eye/nipple color, etc. She looked completely real, but it was like $5,000.00 - a hefty price for a love machine.
Dear, sweet Harley Kwink...I'm madly in love with you. Marry me! We can go to Canadia. Or Boston or something. It'll be grand...You know the cookies are a given. They are ALWAYS a given. You could dump me tomorrow and you'd still get the cookies. Boston..shit, wherever dyke weddings were legalized. And where better to rub their little piggie noses in how bad they suck than right on their doorstep? What are they gonna do? Be jealous of you? Stare furiously at your tah-tahs? Not willingly give you cookies, but instead begrudgingly give you their cookies? Woman, time to wake up to the powers you wield - Uschi
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yeah 5,000.00 or 2.99 for some hand cream......ugh I don't know.
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Quote:
PJP said:
yeah actually....in Men' Health they said more women cheat....and they are smart enough to get away with it.
I don't know if more women cheat, but I do believe that those that do won't get caught - unless they want to get caught. Eddie Murphy did a whole routine on this in Raw or Delirious (I forget which one) about men being dogs and women being cats and the whole cheating thing...funny stuff.
Dear, sweet Harley Kwink...I'm madly in love with you. Marry me! We can go to Canadia. Or Boston or something. It'll be grand...You know the cookies are a given. They are ALWAYS a given. You could dump me tomorrow and you'd still get the cookies. Boston..shit, wherever dyke weddings were legalized. And where better to rub their little piggie noses in how bad they suck than right on their doorstep? What are they gonna do? Be jealous of you? Stare furiously at your tah-tahs? Not willingly give you cookies, but instead begrudgingly give you their cookies? Woman, time to wake up to the powers you wield - Uschi
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Quote:
harleykwin said:
Quote:
Pig Iron said:
I, myself, can't wait for love robots...
Y'know, there was a "Real Sex" episode on HBO that talked about custom made sex doll with real hair, glass eyes, and suction like orafices -- No joke, you could quite literally mold your perfect woman choosing hair color/length; breast size, eye/nipple color, etc. She looked completely real, but it was like $5,000.00 - a hefty price for a love machine.
They atleast have to move and talk.....pfftttt...
It wouldn't be a woman if it didn't talk..
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Quote:
Pig Iron said:
Quote:
harleykwin said:
Quote:
Pig Iron said:
I, myself, can't wait for love robots...
Y'know, there was a "Real Sex" episode on HBO that talked about custom made sex doll with real hair, glass eyes, and suction like orafices -- No joke, you could quite literally mold your perfect woman choosing hair color/length; breast size, eye/nipple color, etc. She looked completely real, but it was like $5,000.00 - a hefty price for a love machine.
They atleast have to move and talk.....pfftttt...
It wouldn't be a woman if it didn't talk..
don't you mean complain?
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Quote:
Pig Iron said:
Quote:
harleykwin said:
3. Don't tell us you want us to show/tell you what we like in bed, and then get annoyed when we do tell you. Guys talk about how they want us to be more open in the bedroom, but you don't. I don't know if its insecurity or what, but if you are going to ask me if I like it harder/softer/faster/slower/this position/whatever, don't get annoyed at me when I (gently) tell you how I like it. If you don't want to know, stop fucking asking.
I like #3
I knew there was a reason I liked you.
If a man doesn't like #3 then they are insecure...
Unfortunately, there are quite a few men who ask, but don't really want to be told - I've heard this complaint from a number of women, and its happened to me as well.
Dear, sweet Harley Kwink...I'm madly in love with you. Marry me! We can go to Canadia. Or Boston or something. It'll be grand...You know the cookies are a given. They are ALWAYS a given. You could dump me tomorrow and you'd still get the cookies. Boston..shit, wherever dyke weddings were legalized. And where better to rub their little piggie noses in how bad they suck than right on their doorstep? What are they gonna do? Be jealous of you? Stare furiously at your tah-tahs? Not willingly give you cookies, but instead begrudgingly give you their cookies? Woman, time to wake up to the powers you wield - Uschi
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If it involves anal or something then no... I can't think of anything else...unless it involves clowns and animals...
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Quote:
PJP said:
Quote:
Pig Iron said:
Quote:
harleykwin said:
Quote:
Pig Iron said:
I, myself, can't wait for love robots...
Y'know, there was a "Real Sex" episode on HBO that talked about custom made sex doll with real hair, glass eyes, and suction like orafices -- No joke, you could quite literally mold your perfect woman choosing hair color/length; breast size, eye/nipple color, etc. She looked completely real, but it was like $5,000.00 - a hefty price for a love machine.
They atleast have to move and talk.....pfftttt...
It wouldn't be a woman if it didn't talk..
don't you mean complain?
Pedro said: Or complain
Y'know, I was going to make a snarky comment about my own gender (cuz I am aware of our own faults as well), but I knew someone would beat me to the punch...
O 
Dear, sweet Harley Kwink...I'm madly in love with you. Marry me! We can go to Canadia. Or Boston or something. It'll be grand...You know the cookies are a given. They are ALWAYS a given. You could dump me tomorrow and you'd still get the cookies. Boston..shit, wherever dyke weddings were legalized. And where better to rub their little piggie noses in how bad they suck than right on their doorstep? What are they gonna do? Be jealous of you? Stare furiously at your tah-tahs? Not willingly give you cookies, but instead begrudgingly give you their cookies? Woman, time to wake up to the powers you wield - Uschi
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Quote:
harleykwin said:
Y'know, there was a "Real Sex" episode on HBO that talked about custom made sex doll with real hair, glass eyes, and suction like orafices -- No joke, you could quite literally mold your perfect woman choosing hair color/length; breast size, eye/nipple color, etc. She looked completely real, but it was like $5,000.00 - a hefty price for a love machine.
Heh, I remember that show...not that particular episode however.
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Quote:
PJP said:
so you admit it......Ha!
Admit what????
Dear, sweet Harley Kwink...I'm madly in love with you. Marry me! We can go to Canadia. Or Boston or something. It'll be grand...You know the cookies are a given. They are ALWAYS a given. You could dump me tomorrow and you'd still get the cookies. Boston..shit, wherever dyke weddings were legalized. And where better to rub their little piggie noses in how bad they suck than right on their doorstep? What are they gonna do? Be jealous of you? Stare furiously at your tah-tahs? Not willingly give you cookies, but instead begrudgingly give you their cookies? Woman, time to wake up to the powers you wield - Uschi
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Quote:
Pig Iron said:
If it involves anal or something then no... I can't think of anything else...unless it involves clowns and animals...
Sorry, I'm sleepy - what are you responding to? That a man would be open to anal (giving not taking, of course  ), but not clowns?
I'm sleepy, but also delirious bc. the Yankees won.  
Dear, sweet Harley Kwink...I'm madly in love with you. Marry me! We can go to Canadia. Or Boston or something. It'll be grand...You know the cookies are a given. They are ALWAYS a given. You could dump me tomorrow and you'd still get the cookies. Boston..shit, wherever dyke weddings were legalized. And where better to rub their little piggie noses in how bad they suck than right on their doorstep? What are they gonna do? Be jealous of you? Stare furiously at your tah-tahs? Not willingly give you cookies, but instead begrudgingly give you their cookies? Woman, time to wake up to the powers you wield - Uschi
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Quote:
harleykwin said:
Quote:
Pig Iron said:
If it involves anal or something then no... I can't think of anything else...unless it involves clowns and animals...
Sorry, I'm sleepy - what are you responding to? That a man would be open to anal (giving not taking, of course ), but not clowns?
I'm sleepy, but also delirious bc. the Yankees won.
No..I said, then no. No clowns or animals either..pretty much everything else is open though... toys, positions, excessive amounts and time spent on womanly nether regions, role playing, more toys, rough, soft, talking , whatever...
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Quote:
harleykwin said:
Quote:
PJP said:
so you admit it......Ha!
Admit what????
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I changed the title of this thread to include men, just to make things clear.
About the whole what women want in bed thing.
I've always seen it as the man is going to get off 99% of the time, and becuase of that he should be willing to help the women get off. He should listen to her and discuss what she wants him to do.
November 6th, 2012: Americas new Independence Day.
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and since you're a woman you have firsthand knowledge
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November 6th, 2012: Americas new Independence Day.
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November 6th, 2012: Americas new Independence Day.
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Guys don't wanna commit primarily because they are so used to girls toying and using them......that's what I think anyways ;p
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He fixes the cable?
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He fixes the cable?
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Granted.......it's a trait of the species but God also gave us cuteness to attract the guys who "look over" all of our faults :P
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"God, why are all the pretty ones insane?"
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Quote:
PrincessElisa said:
Guys don't wanna commit primarily because they are so used to girls toying and using them......that's what I think anyways ;p
True. I went through a phase like that a couple years ago after getting treated like shit by a couple girls.
November 6th, 2012: Americas new Independence Day.
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Don't you love it when they start a relationship with you, accept your advances and weeks later say you're too nice and leave?
He fixes the cable?
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"too nice and leave?" Usually it's more of a "I just thought we were friends" line that girls give to guys to totally crush them ;p My sister said that to my best friend at the time grrrrrrr!~
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I get "Marry me!" followed by laughter.
Old men, fear me! You will shatter under my ruthless apathetic assault!
Uschi - 2
Old Men - 0
"I am convinced that this world is of no importance, and that the only people who care about dates are imbeciles and Spanish teachers." -- Jean Arp, 1921
"If Jesus came back and saw what people are doing in his name, he would never never stop throwing up." - Max von Sydow, "Hannah and Her Sisters"
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Now that's heartless........
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So the saga continues between two friends of mine. They dated for 6 and a half years, breaking up about a couple months after moving in with each other. They still live together (he goes to school in Wisconsin so he's far enough away at times), and now he has a new girlfriend. She, expectedly, is upset about it. I don't blame her for being jealous, but she's gonna be coming to me for pity and what-not. They're relationship was far from good. From day one they fought like crazy. She's needy and emotional, which I've come to believe is a product of his controlling and tempramental attitude. They're nuts.
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Quote:
PrincessElisa said:
Now that's heartless........
Well, I'm laughing too. It's usually from friends.
Old men, fear me! You will shatter under my ruthless apathetic assault!
Uschi - 2
Old Men - 0
"I am convinced that this world is of no importance, and that the only people who care about dates are imbeciles and Spanish teachers." -- Jean Arp, 1921
"If Jesus came back and saw what people are doing in his name, he would never never stop throwing up." - Max von Sydow, "Hannah and Her Sisters"
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