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What is 'I Hate Kevin Costner' Day?
During my freshman year in college - lo, these five years ago - I decided that being single on Valentine's Day sucked. Not only that, but I also decided that calling V-Day "Singles Awareness Day" was merely adding insult to injury. So, while everyone else who "had someone" was busy "having" their "someone," I decided to play a slightly different angle.
Kevin Costner is a terrible actor. No matter how attractive you might find him, you can't deny that that's pretty much his only appeal. As his acting goes, he is stiff, wooden, and incapable of emotion - an Al Gore for the cinema. Granted, I do enjoy some of his movies... but just like good actors can do bad films, I maintain that bad actors can do good ones (like Keanu in the first Matrix).
So, rather than celebrate a love that I do not have, I decided to take the opposite side... and celebrate my hatred for Kevin Costner and his [lack of] acting ability. Therefore, for me (and you, should you choose to adopt this practice), February 14th will always be known as 'I Hate Kevin Costner' Day!
How do I celebrate 'I Hate Kevin Costner' Day?
It's really quite simple.
- Step #1: Go out and rent a Kevin Costner movie. (Remember: the worse the better. Personally, I'd take a film like Waterworld, Dragonfly, or The Postman over films like The Untouchables, Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves, and Field of Dreams... but that's just me.)
- Step #2: Assemble a group of like-minded, (preferably) single Costner haters for a pseudo-public screening of the film you choose.
- Step #3: Publicly, and as a community, mock his singular lack of acting ability.
- Step #4: Repeat as necessary (or as is tolerable - the most Costner films I've ever been able to sit through is two).
What if I actually like Kevin Costner?
Then you are a sheep and, quite honestly, there is no saving you.
However, the beauty of this holiday is its inclusion and accomodation for all. If you like Kevin Costner, than substitute a celebrity who's body of work you loathe as much as I loathe Costner's, like Keanu Reeves, Hayden Christensen, or William Shatner. The possibilities are almost endless.
Well, I believe I have created awareness for my makeshift holiday. Enjoy, all, and...
Happy 'I Hate Kevin Costner' Day, everybody!
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Quote:
Chewy Walrus said:
What if I actually like Kevin Costner?
Then you are a sheep and, quite honestly, there is no saving you.
(and no, I don't like Costner, save for The Untouchables.)
 Dear, sweet Harley Kwink...I'm madly in love with you. Marry me! We can go to Canadia. Or Boston or something. It'll be grand...You know the cookies are a given. They are ALWAYS a given. You could dump me tomorrow and you'd still get the cookies. Boston..shit, wherever dyke weddings were legalized. And where better to rub their little piggie noses in how bad they suck than right on their doorstep? What are they gonna do? Be jealous of you? Stare furiously at your tah-tahs? Not willingly give you cookies, but instead begrudgingly give you their cookies? Woman, time to wake up to the powers you wield - Uschi
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Quote:
PJP said:
I liked The Postman.
I like Kevin Costner......For Love of the Game.
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Waterworld was this Generation's It's a Wonderful Life!
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Bull Durham
Field of Dreams
Silverado
plus he was the dead guy in The Big Chill
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Ah... I remember fondly the movies of IHKCD past...
What are you watching this year, Chewy?
Reveling in the knowledge that Sammitch will never interrupt my nookie ever again.
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Dunno. I didn't get to finish The Postman last year... but I might go rent Dragonfly. Haven't really decided yet.
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The Postman was one of the top 10 films of all time.
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Everyday should be I hate Kevin Costner day.
November 6th, 2012: Americas new Independence Day.
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Quote:
rex said:
Everyday should be I hate Kevin Costner day.
Finally. The voice of reason.
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Quote:
Chewy Walrus said:
Dunno. I didn't get to finish The Postman last year... but I might go rent Dragonfly. Haven't really decided yet.
well, let me tell ya about dragonfly. my wife loved it. i thought it sucked. i took a nap. the end.
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The Untouchables. He was good in the Untouchables.
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I was pleasantly surprised by Open Range as it not only starred, but also was directed by, Kevin Costner. That movie is second only to Tombstone for my favorite modern western.
Knutreturns said: Spoken like the true Greatest RDCW Champ!
All hail King Snarf!
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Quote:
Chewy Walrus said:
Quote:
rex said:
Everyday should be I hate Kevin Costner day.
Finally. The voice of reason.
Chewy, look who posted that & rethink what you just said!
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Fair enough... but he did have a damn good point.
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SockChewy is just around the corner, I can see it now!
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Quote:
PJP said:
The Postman was one of the top 10 films of all time.
 Are you on crack or something?!!
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That would depend on what top ten list it was on. I can see it being at least #6 on the biggest pieces of shit list.
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Quote:
Chris Oakley said:
Quote:
PJP said:
The Postman was one of the top 10 films of all time.
Are you on crack or something?!!
this is proof that you are out to get me.
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Say what?
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Quote:
PJP said:
I liked The Postman.
Me too!
(wait...is he being a douchbag here? never can tell on teh internet)
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No... he's being a douchebag.
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'I Hate Kevin Costner' Day 2007 - Coming soon!
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He's still one of my favorite actors.......meat.
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Kevin Costner- The Guardian
"Are you eating it...or is it eating you?" [center] ![[Linked Image from i13.photobucket.com]](http://i13.photobucket.com/albums/a275/captainsammitch/boards/banners/blogban3.jpg) [/center] [center] ![[Linked Image from i13.photobucket.com]](http://i13.photobucket.com/albums/a275/captainsammitch/boards/banners/jlamiska.jpg) [/center]
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Sorry Chewy...I had to. 
"Are you eating it...or is it eating you?" [center] [/center] [center] [/center]
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