#67715
2003-06-11 12:36 AM
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Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,367 Likes: 13
Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
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Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,367 Likes: 13 |
He says he's been playing the arse trumpet.
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#67716
2003-06-11 1:27 AM
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Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 23,091
The Once, and Future Cunt 15000+ posts
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The Once, and Future Cunt 15000+ posts
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 23,091 |
Is there a spot in my head I can fire nails into with a nail gun and not lose memory or motor skills?
If so which part?
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#67717
2003-06-11 3:15 AM
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Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 19,516 Likes: 12
brother from another mother 15000+ posts
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brother from another mother 15000+ posts
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 19,516 Likes: 12 |
Dave,do you wish you would have been a porn star instead of a lawyer?
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#67718
2003-06-11 5:50 AM
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Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,367 Likes: 13
Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
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Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,367 Likes: 13 |
quote:
Originally posted by Ultimate Jaburg53:
Is there a spot in my head I can fire nails into with a nail gun and not lose memory or motor skills?
If so which part?
Yes, your nose.
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#67719
2003-06-11 5:55 AM
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Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,367 Likes: 13
Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
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Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,367 Likes: 13 |
quote:
Originally posted by Lothar of The Hill People:
Dave,do you wish you would have been a porn star instead of a lawyer?
I don't think I would have been a very good porn star. Having a crew of 20 including lights and cameras would have thrown me off my game. Besides, don't porn stars bleach their buttholes so they're more aesthetically appealing to the camera? No one is going anywhere near my butthole with bleach.
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#67720
2003-06-11 10:12 AM
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Joined: May 2001
Posts: 2,704
Frustrated! . . . with kids! 2500+ posts
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Frustrated! . . . with kids! 2500+ posts
Joined: May 2001
Posts: 2,704 |
quote:
Originally posted by Dave:
quote:
Will Bianca keep falling down in front of her boyfriend?
Not as often as her underwear.
FYI . . . my panties don't "fall down." ![[nyah hah]](images/icons/tongue.gif)
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#67721
2003-06-11 10:40 AM
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 32,001 Likes: 1
We already are 15000+ posts
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We already are 15000+ posts
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 32,001 Likes: 1 |
quote:
Originally posted by Dave:
quote:
Originally posted by Ultimate Jaburg53:
Is there a spot in my head I can fire nails into with a nail gun and not lose memory or motor skills?
If so which part?
Yes, your nose.
Don't answer that question Dave.......He'll actually go and do it. ![[whaaaa!]](eek01.gif)
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#67722
2003-06-11 11:15 AM
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Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 24,593
Timelord. Drunkard. 15000+ posts
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Timelord. Drunkard. 15000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 24,593 |
quote:
Originally posted by PJP:
quote:
Originally posted by Dave:
quote:
Originally posted by Ultimate Jaburg53:
Is there a spot in my head I can fire nails into with a nail gun and not lose memory or motor skills?
If so which part?
Yes, your nose.
Don't answer that question Dave.......He'll actually go and do it.
And the downside would be? ![[eh?]](images/icons/confused.gif)
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#67723
2003-06-11 1:48 PM
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Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 23,091
The Once, and Future Cunt 15000+ posts
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The Once, and Future Cunt 15000+ posts
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 23,091 |
Sylvester McCoy was a more entertaining Doctor!
There I said it.
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#67724
2003-06-11 2:30 PM
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Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 24,593
Timelord. Drunkard. 15000+ posts
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Timelord. Drunkard. 15000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2002
Posts: 24,593 |
But he never had a companion like this: 
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#67725
2003-06-11 2:32 PM
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Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 23,091
The Once, and Future Cunt 15000+ posts
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The Once, and Future Cunt 15000+ posts
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 23,091 |
No, but he played the spoons. That was almost as good! No ![[no no no]](graemlins/nono.gif) , no it wasn't.
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#67726
2003-06-11 9:09 PM
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Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,367 Likes: 13
Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
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Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,367 Likes: 13 |
quote:
Originally posted by Bianca:
quote:
Originally posted by Dave:
quote:
Will Bianca keep falling down in front of her boyfriend?
Not as often as her underwear.
FYI . . . my panties don't "fall down."
![[wink]](images/icons/wink.gif)
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#67727
2003-06-11 9:15 PM
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Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 395
300+ posts
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300+ posts
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 395 |
Hey Dave,
I'm thinking of starting a new career as a lawyer, but not just a lawyer - I'm thinking of starting a boyband consisting mostly of lawyers. Are you willing to join my band? and...can you rap?
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#67728
2003-06-11 9:43 PM
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Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,367 Likes: 13
Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
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Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,367 Likes: 13 |
quote:
Originally posted by Neilencio:
Hey Dave,
I'm thinking of starting a new career as a lawyer, but not just a lawyer - I'm thinking of starting a boyband consisting mostly of lawyers. Are you willing to join my band? and...can you rap?
Say yo to all the homies in the house
Pussy is trying to eat my giant trouser mouse
You go say I'm a mad litigator
But my speciality is that I'm a clitigator
All rise for the judge but if she is stacked
Robes so fully firm, so fully packed
Then the trouser mouse is also gonna rise to the occasion
That's the props about civil litigation.
Another victory for white rap.
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#67729
2003-06-11 10:14 PM
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Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 395
300+ posts
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300+ posts
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 395 |
I think you've just succeeded in making people dislike lawyers and rap even more. it's like hitting two birds with one stone.
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#67730
2003-06-11 10:16 PM
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 12,609
10000+ posts
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10000+ posts
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 12,609 |
quote:
Originally posted by Ultimate Jaburg53:
Sylvester McCoy was a more entertaining Doctor!
There I said it.
Its damn true!!!
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#67731
2003-06-11 10:17 PM
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 12,609
10000+ posts
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10000+ posts
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 12,609 |
quote:
Originally posted by thedoctor:
But he never had a companion like this:
I prefered Peri despite that horrific American accent!
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#67732
2003-06-12 2:50 AM
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Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 2,933
old one eye 2500+ posts
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old one eye 2500+ posts
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 2,933 |
quote:
Originally posted by Dave:
quote:
Originally posted by Neilencio:
Hey Dave,
I'm thinking of starting a new career as a lawyer, but not just a lawyer - I'm thinking of starting a boyband consisting mostly of lawyers. Are you willing to join my band? and...can you rap?
Say yo to all the homies in the house
Pussy is trying to eat my giant trouser mouse
You go say I'm a mad litigator
But my speciality is that I'm a clitigator
All rise for the judge but if she is stacked
Robes so fully firm, so fully packed
Then the trouser mouse is also gonna rise to the occasion
That's the props about civil litigation.
Another victory for white rap.
Dave's got his grove on. ![[cool]](images/icons/cool.gif)
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#67733
2003-06-12 7:03 AM
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Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,367 Likes: 13
Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
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Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,367 Likes: 13 |
quote:
Originally posted by Neilencio:
I think you've just succeeded in making people dislike lawyers and rap even more. it's like hitting two birds with one stone.
Yet another victory!
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#67734
2003-11-06 8:33 AM
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Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 19,516 Likes: 12
brother from another mother 15000+ posts
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brother from another mother 15000+ posts
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 19,516 Likes: 12 |
Dave,whats the name of the new law firm you work for? It's not Wolfram and Heart is it?
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#67735
2003-11-06 9:04 AM
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Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,367 Likes: 13
Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
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Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,367 Likes: 13 |
Nope, never heard of them.
Its Cage, Fish and McBeal.
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#67736
2003-11-06 2:36 PM
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,203
betrayal and collapse 5000+ posts
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betrayal and collapse 5000+ posts
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 5,203 |
Never rap again, whitey! ![[...rassamnfrackin...]](graemlins/grumble01.gif)
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#67737
2003-11-06 6:16 PM
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Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 19,516 Likes: 12
brother from another mother 15000+ posts
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brother from another mother 15000+ posts
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 19,516 Likes: 12 |
quote:
Originally posted by Dave:
Nope, never heard of them.
Its Cage, Fish and McBeal.
So your getting it on with Calista Flockheart now,eh.
Wolfram and Hart is the name of the supernatural evil law firm in the Angel TV series.
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#67738
2003-11-08 12:43 AM
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Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,367 Likes: 13
Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
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Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,367 Likes: 13 |
That's just TV, lawyers aren't really evil. quote:
Originally posted by theory9:
Never rap again, whitey!
Its just like Eight Mile all over again!
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Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 13,392
[insert non-dated reference here] 10000+ posts
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[insert non-dated reference here] 10000+ posts
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 13,392 |
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Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 8,971
URG am real man! 7500+ posts
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URG am real man! 7500+ posts
Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 8,971 |
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Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 13,392
[insert non-dated reference here] 10000+ posts
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[insert non-dated reference here] 10000+ posts
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 13,392 |
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Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 8,971
URG am real man! 7500+ posts
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URG am real man! 7500+ posts
Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 8,971 |
You am allways have a little woody sticking out of your pants.
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Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 13,392
[insert non-dated reference here] 10000+ posts
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[insert non-dated reference here] 10000+ posts
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 13,392 |
Why are you staring at my crotch, dude?
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Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 8,971
URG am real man! 7500+ posts
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URG am real man! 7500+ posts
Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 8,971 |
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Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 24,106
faggot 15000+ posts
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faggot 15000+ posts
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 24,106 |
Old men, fear me! You will shatter under my ruthless apathetic assault!
Uschi - 2
Old Men - 0
"I am convinced that this world is of no importance, and that the only people who care about dates are imbeciles and Spanish teachers." -- Jean Arp, 1921
"If Jesus came back and saw what people are doing in his name, he would never never stop throwing up." - Max von Sydow, "Hannah and Her Sisters"
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Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 8,971
URG am real man! 7500+ posts
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URG am real man! 7500+ posts
Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 8,971 |
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Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,367 Likes: 13
Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
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Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,367 Likes: 13 |
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 46,308
Who will I break next? 15000+ posts
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Who will I break next? 15000+ posts
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 46,308 |
Thank you, captain obvious. 
November 6th, 2012: Americas new Independence Day.
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Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,367 Likes: 13
Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
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Banned from the DCMBs since 2002. 15000+ posts
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 15,367 Likes: 13 |
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Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 2,933
old one eye 2500+ posts
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old one eye 2500+ posts
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 2,933 |
How you doin'?
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Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 34,398 Likes: 38
"Hey this is PCG342's bro..." 15000+ posts
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"Hey this is PCG342's bro..." 15000+ posts
Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 34,398 Likes: 38 |
Quote:
First Amongst Daves said:
Ask me a question, and pearls of wisdom will be yours.
Did Oswald act alone?
"Are you eating it...or is it eating you?" [center] ![[Linked Image from i13.photobucket.com]](http://i13.photobucket.com/albums/a275/captainsammitch/boards/banners/blogban3.jpg) [/center] [center] ![[Linked Image from i13.photobucket.com]](http://i13.photobucket.com/albums/a275/captainsammitch/boards/banners/jlamiska.jpg) [/center]
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Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 4,753
Ignored by 3 users and 2 moderators 4000+ posts
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Ignored by 3 users and 2 moderators 4000+ posts
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 4,753 |
Joey From Friends talkative User How You Doin'?
2000+ posts Sat May 10 2008 02:32 AM Reading a post
Forum: off topic and offensive posts
Thread: The "Ask Dave" Thread.
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
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The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
BON JOVI
Last Cigarette
Regrets are all you left, on your lipstick stains
Take a picture of our past there in that ashtray
We had our fun, I used to light your flame
Like the dancing smoke that rose we tried to find our way
No one told me, she told me
Your love's like one last cigarette
Last cigarette, I will savor it
The last cigarette
Take it in and hold your breath, hope it never ends
But when it's gone, it's gone
The last cigarette
Just to breathe reminds me of what used to be
The smoke's the ghost that keeps you close when I can't sleep
Don't ask the past to last, it's about to change
The memories don't answer when I call your name
No one told me, she told me
[Chorus]
Your love's like one last cigarette
Last cigarette, I will savor it
The last cigarette
Take it in and hold your breath, hope it never ends
But when it's gone, it's gone
One last cigarette, last cigarette
One I can't forget, the last cigarette
Right there at my fingertips, got your taste still on my lips
Right or wrong
You're still gone, gone, gone
No one told me, she told me
You always lose the girl in a Brian Wilson world
[Chorus]
No one told me, she told me
The Last Cigarette
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158
The alt 15000+ posts
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The alt 15000+ posts
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 18,158 |
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