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Joe Mama said:
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Silky Johnson said:
Ladies and gentlemen, let us all applaud the master detective. Clearly, an intelligent person like Crow would make an alt with such obvious connections to himself, such as a "Horseman" reference and a constant coexistance in threads.

Nevermind the small fact that Crow has mentioned that Scratch is his buddy, a fact which seems to be bolstered when visiting his MySpace page (through the link in his sig) and discovering a gentleman named Scratch at the top of his Top Friends list. ...Also nevermind the fact that in in Crow and Scratch's profile, you can find pics of the both of them together.

And I don't mean "together" in the sense that myself and your mama were together in a Denny's bathroom, all those years ago.

No, I have a feeling that if someone like Crow made an alt, it would be considerably smarter than the offspring of that unfortunate union.





Ignoring The Doctor's weak and sad attempt to bring the dirrrty South (emphasis on "dirrrty") to this hatin' party, what the hell happened to Silky Johnson? Once the premier hater in all the land, once the former Hater Of The Year, now he's reduced to frequenting Myspace and using smilies? Is Silky Johnson dating, and inevitably disappointing, Elisa? Have you found God, Silky? Or did you find a brand of panties that snugly fit your bony ass?

Silky, I recommend that you get in touch with your inner hater. Remember just how much of a disappointment you are to the women you ply with rufies and the uncle who still finds time to diddle you. Remember how so many of us eat at the finest buffets while yo' broke ass scrounges for stale doughnuts and muffins, ever hopeful of the rare and elusive carrot cake muffin. Remember the times when the woman you called "mama" fed you with a slingshot while getting railed from behind by the myriad men you called "daddy" on any given day. Remember these things and get back to hatin' the way we KNOW you can hate! Otherwise, I'll slap you around like I'm yo' pimp and steal yo' lunch money, you Brokeback Hater!



Oh! So hateful, Joe Mama! Someone must have spilled water on your McDonalds coupon book, this morning.

Sometimes when you're dealing with detectives who have yet to pass Blues Clues University, one needs to insert a smilie to signpost the gigantic doggie footprints. Not that it seems to have helped Shaggy there, or even you, for that matter, Velma.

Maybe it's time to kick Prometheus out of the Mystery Machine, and let Doctor Shaggy grab the old stick again. Also, that would help you solve the mystery of whether or not the good Doctor really has a prehensile anus. ...If he can shift, you must acquit!

I wish I could say that my liasion with Elisa was the highlight of my brief tour through the alley behind that airport bar, but I'm forced to admit that finally being able to vomit up the excess alcohol and chicken wings that I'd consumed that evening was cathartic and gave me the energy to hate on the fact that her penis was larger than mine. ...But, you're correct, Joe Mama, I did find God when her mouth was full and I could no longer hear her speak.

As for my hatin' abilities, don't you worry, Joe Mama. I'm bitter to the core. I hate that all of you have so much and I have so very, very little. I hate the thought that little children in Ethiopia are fortunate enough to be eating bugs, while all I have to feast on is the visage of that failed wad of misshapen pizza dough you call a face. I hate that somewhere in Cambodia, thousands of sweatshop workers are dropping dead of exhaustion, as they try to loom you a new muu-muu. I hate the knowledge that your mama's waiting for just the right moment to sue me for back child support, and take the clothes off my back, so she can feed them to her son.

I hate you, I hate your women: the Doctor and Prometheus, I hate crawfordcrow, and I hate every last poster who ever registered on the RKMBS. You haven't seen the last of me, Joe Mama. I'll be at Sea World, 3 o'clock sharp, for your first show, distracting you from your backflips by waving sticks of butter.

Time-Travelling Player Hater Extraordinaire. I hope Joe Mama comes to your house and uses your bathroom. If you cross me, I'll go back in time and pull out of your momma.